I have discovered a brilliant use for
Stephen Fry, and one which I dare say the iconic hero of our time would much
appreciate. I have discovered that if you read your words as if you were
Stephen Fry, then it is a much better indicator of what you are trying to
portray to the reader. I think it gives everything a whole new perspective. The
dog says its still RUBBISH but he is reading it in the voice of Virginia Woolf
…. HAHAH HAHH HAHAH . Mum has just said IDIOT.
Now you are probably
thinking to yourselves, this is all very well but what about the diary, what
exactly have I been doing today, well erm sort of nothing. Thing is it is
raining and it’s not nice wild buccaneering, head to the wind; while the
seagulls hug the waves rain. No it is just wet drizzly dull grey rain that just
makes you wet and is no fun and we all hate that sort of rain. So there you go
I have wasted my day. but it is half term it is traditional for school children
to be incredibly inefficient and waste holidays and then realize on the Sunday
evening, the night before returning to school that they have loads of homework
to do …….. AH. Maybe I should not have written that mum has just shouted DO
YOUR HOMEWORK. I will do that just as
soon as I have got this bit of fluff out of this small tube that I found under
the floor which is off a ???? Well it
might be useful (the tube not the fluff).
By the way just to let the
world know my very good friend Ian the Musical Hat Maker is off today to the
hospital too have his second bionic knee (OP tomorrow). This is good news and
means he will be able to do his famous triple somersault while playing the
guitar solo in Stairway to Haven; although because his legs are not steam
powered like Pirate Pete’s he says he will be unable to run at fifty miles an
hour and estimates a top speed of only about thirty miles an hour.
Hopefully Auntie Karen has
had a good drive to and from the hospital. Because we live in Wales you are
sent half way to Scotland to have your OP because the powers that be, say that’s
where you have to go, and you’re not allowed to complain or else.
Now some of you are
thinking hang on he’s done (written) some of this stuff before and I have but
there are two things to consider. The first is Mr Ian has two legs and it
really is not fair to leave him running round in circles and the second is YAH
SUCKS BOOO I don’t care ……. Mum said IDIOT again.
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