Sunday, 23 October 2011

Montgomery Castle, the Light Bulb, and the Moth

It has been a nice but windy day and getting windier by the minute, luckily for us our house in is the lea of a hill which on the top has the remains of Montgomery castle built a long time ago about the thirteenth century I think. I cant ask the history teacher as it is Sunday and the dog is stuffed with curry and says he refuses to think until tomorrow and I should jolly well b*********** ***** ****** off.

 I spent part of the morning up a tree removing lights which have been there for years. Apparently in 1503 when the house was owned by one of the earliest mad scientists. He came up with this great idea called electricity and built something called a light bulb to show how it could be used to the benefit of man he filled the tree next to us with lights (Electric Light Bulbs) powered by electricity. Everyone was well impressed but the great Lord Montgomery from the castle had a daughter (the princess) who was allergic to Moths. This had never been a problem with candles and oil lamps because the Moths would spiral closer and closer until Puff …… ZAP and well that was the end of them. But with the new electric Light bulbs they would go round and round all night, and because the electric light bulbs were much brighter than all the other lights, every dam Moth for fifty miles turned up in Montgomery.

The Princess would whinge and whinge about these Moths, ending up covered in spots and sneezing so in the end Lord Montgomery banished the Mad Scientist to the colonies and decreed that the light bulbs be removed from the tree. Anyway I finally got round to it this Morning ………. Mum has just said IDIOT

I then spent the afternoon disposing of rubbish in the Pit of Doom with the Grumbling Child in it, he did shout a lot but then he does that. Apparently there is no such thing as rubbish just stuff in the wrong place, which is worth knowing because it solves a lot of problems. 


  1. i really enjoy your posts Rob. they leave me in a state of both confusion and serenity which is a wonderful place to exist. thankyou and carry on the good work. chinchin!

  2. You are very kind Mr Hogart was it your bother in the movie The African Queen by the way.

    I did wite a much longer reply, but I am on the very stupid laptop and hit the wrong key and it all vanished. Now my diary is based on fact but I just start typing and its anyones guess what comes out. That means what I wrote is gone lost for ever ........... silly laptop

    I have to write the diary like that because to write everyday would be impossible any other way. But it will explain why what I write usually confuses me too as I only read it later on and think WHAT????

    By the way posting as anon because I am on the stupid laptop ..........grumble grumble

  3. Brother not bother ..... although it is a bother now stupid laptop

  4. Don't tell me they were christmas lights O_o

  5. I think i know who you mean, hes been copying my name (almost) even before i came up with it, which is a bit cheeky to say the least. the nerve of some people.
    hope the laptop/computer troubles are resolved soon. mine just stares at me blankly expecting ME to clean all the crumbs off its keyboard...

  6. These lights were Christmas lights once a long long long long time ago but no more because even light bulbs decay and rot. Which they have so now they are in a box in our house along with all the other boxes ready to be moved where we will look at them periodically and go ....... AH

    I like computers by the way and have at least half a dozen only they are not modern posh ones they are about 10 years old many throw away's but they can be made to work by the very clever Techy; the Ghost Writer. The only modern clever one is the laptop, yes the stupid laptop which is good at lots of things but can be a pain in the neck, and refuses to help me on the internet even a little; not even to say SORRY ROB THAT@S SPELT WELL WONG sorry WRONG the old PC's help me loads ...... well a bit sometimes