The Start of Master Plan Number 42

Today it has started and we all know what that is going to mean . . . . .  Well it will mean with some degree of certainty that I will be posting stuff slightly less than normal. OK yes that bit has already started, but that is because I have been busy trying to stay on top of the garden and also slowly but surely working towards moving the office. The first step of which was running a network cable to the new room, which I have now done I just need to sort the room out a bit, it is rather full of stuff. (a chaps work is never done).

Right back to the main point, as you all know I tend to post a picture of some sort with most of my blog posts, things I have drawn most of the time in the days or day previously. Well I have been requested by a friend to turn them into solid pictures that can hang on the wall and be poked at by folks fingers as they ponder and say things like . . . . Well what is that meant to be its Rubbish . . . .  The public are a fickle and unforgiving bunch who do have a habit of saying. . . . I could do that. . . . 

So today or strictly speaking last night I started to turn the first of these images into a tangible solid thing. They will be smallish, I don’t have the resources to create huge pictures, and will actually be slightly sort of three dimensional. A bit like the cardboard sculpture I have created on and off for years only flatter, anyway I have a plan and know exactly what I want these to look like. All I need to do is see if the plan works with the first picture.

So what this means is time is a bit limited I will find it impossible to post something on the blog every day as well as move the office and stay on top of the garden, it is well over half an acre and write poetry and get an exhibition together for hopefully the end of this year.  So if I do vanish for a few days then all is well; if I vanish for say three weeks then all is not well and I will need to be rescued from mad Zombies or something of a similar nature.

You can all blame my good friend Mr Charlie but I have told him he has to be my manager now and do all the organising as I am a temperamental and grumpy artist.  I still am not sure if this exhibition will happen, but I will give it my best and we will see how it all pans out, you know what life is like sometimes stuff works and sometimes stuff does not.      

Pizza Slice, The Dark Creature of the Undergrowth, Aliens and Elsewhere

I have not achieved a great deal today, it has been that sort of day I looked at a little job involving some tongue and groove panelling but did not have the things I needed, so sort of waved the various bits about shook my head a lot pointed and said OOOOO sorry madam it needs a new thermitechnic screw adjuster like all good plumbers and then said I would be back two weeks next Thursday. However mum said I was not a plumber I was an IDIOT and sent me out to do things elsewhere, but I knew where here was and I knew where there was but I could not find elsewhere. Despite asking everyone I ran into (I say ran into I was walking and did not make any physical contact) such as the Banshees and the Lemmings of Petrograd, who were playing leap frog ( Lemmings, leap frog . . . . .HAH HAHAHHAHAHH HAH ha hah ah hah ah ahahhah ha ha ha) a few Zombies, a few Cows, a Raven, The Dark Creature of the Undergrowth, Mr Jones, Esmeralda and Freddie who have formed a new group called ‘Watching Alien Invasion Tactics’ or WAIT for short. Apparently Mr Jones often chases aliens through the woods shouting WAIT  . . . . . . take me to your leader.

Hang on what was I saying  . . . . . . AH YES elsewhere; when I asked everyone I was looking for elsewhere they would generally scratch their heads ask if I meant here and when I said no they would suggest over there but I was not looking for there I was looking for elsewhere. I spent a lot of time doing that until I worked out I had been here there and everywhere, although not elsewhere. You can see how a chaps day can vanish like sand through the fingers of a little old ladies hand when perusing such a task, strangely it is the sort of task us chaps will do for hours and women tend not too even for five minutes, although I don’t know why?

In other news I noticed on the news that a man who I believe was a captain of Star Trek although not Captain Kirk (the real captain) was going on about never eating a pizza slice before even though he is now seventy, although he has eaten pizza. Now call me an IDIOT but me and the Ghost Writer who is well old, are well confused what is a pizza slice if it is not a pizza, If either of use go out a restaurant and order a pizza we want the whole thing not a bit of it.  As I say the poor old Ghost Writer (note the word OLD) and I don’t understand what they were talking about.

Oooo I was a bit rushed for a picture tonight so I photographed my dinner (I know it is a bit healthy looking) and it is not pizza. 

The Surprise in Milton Keynes and Roundabouts

Well as you know yesterday I was away in Molten Beans which in fact turned out to be Milton Keynes, but I knew it sounded like food of some sort. And as I said we were off to see a man about certain things, which was a secret sixtieth birthday party for a very old family friend that dad used to go to school with and then they both worked at the same place for a while and then both moved about in different directions but still managed to remain in contact over the years. We then stayed in a hotel based on the rabbit warren principle which was OK as long as you tied a piece of string to your room door handle, this way you could always get back to it. Until a foolish little old lady cut it in half with a pair of scissors, why do little old ladies carry scissors anyway, its not normal. OK yes I am being distracted and that is not good.

Breakfast was an all you can eat affair with things hidden in large pots quietly bubbling away and piles of toast, cereal and crumpets as well as fruit juice and tea and coffee and so on. Bearing in mind it is an all you can eat job there was not too much fighting going on by the masses, but I think part of that is the hotel getting the fine line between food you then run off and complain about, and food that is really great so you eat loads of it all day. In other words it was OK but after three of four full English breakfasts you just think I am not enjoying this so I will go. But all in all it was OK for a rabbit warren.

The party was good too and Mr F (who was sixty) and Miss A (his wife) got a shock because he was not expecting to see us and when he saw me he shouted O MY GOD YOU'RE NOT HERE TOO AAAAaaaaAAaaaaaaauugggghHHHH but mum said it was OK as she had chained me to a table. Apparently it’s an old tradition in Milton Keynes that the youngest is chained to a table at parties, I asked a few people because it sounded a bit odd to me but they all said it was.

I am not sure how many of you have been to Milton Keynes it is an odd place to drive round as I remembered when dad starting swearing a lot, because it is full of roundabouts, hundreds of them and all the main roads are lined with bushes and trees so look identical. The result of this is that if you do not know where you are or where you are going you do go round and round in circles and round and round roundabouts all day.

Then today we have arrived home at the time we were expected to arrive home and so all is well although I have had a message from the Ghost Writer who says he has to go to work tomorrow and it is NOT FAIR . . . .

.Ooooooo Yes the fish pond is still frozen, it was like that when we left.