Tuesday 29 August 2023

Its Me

Yes I thought I would pass by and say hello. I am working on a cunning plan, only I am working on it very slowly, as I have never been one for rushing about on the grounds it is not good for you. Now that I am old and battered I can't rush anyway, but the fact I am old and battered does tend to prove not rushing about is not a bad thing. Anyway I am in the process of writing a book, I have so far written two, one of which has been proofread and the other is in the process of being proofread. I am also drawing images for a friend who is writing the second book in a series about a cat. So as you can see I am a busy chap

This is one of the pictures I drew, but it was not suitable, and it does have a few issues so there is a second version of it for the book about the cat which will be tweaked to look posh and hide any mistakes (the images not the book).. I never mind too much. One other interesting thing I have done today is make a tall marble run. I bought the thing to keep my youngest grandson amused ages ago, only he has not seen it yet, however it keeps me amused from time to time, and is an entirely stress free pastime 


 

Wednesday 16 November 2022

I'm still doing stuff. . . . But not here

OK I am a terrible blogger these days, but it does not mean I am not quietly working away in the background. One little project has been creating a bit of artwork for a friend who has written a book. It all sort of got delayed somewhat due to life the universe and stuff. This is one of the pictures for that book.

Due to all the delays I then thought  . . . . . . Hang on I reckon I could write a book, it must be easier than drawing pictures for a book, and so as I type I am about half way through it at about 60,000 words. It would help if I could type a little better than I can and also if I knew in a little more detail how it will end. All I know for certain is that Brian, Brenda and their Parrot will be OK and Inspector Clarke will end with a new fancy office and the possibility of a sequel.

Right folk it is time for me to go it is late here in the UK and I was up early this morning delivering things to my daughter.  




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Saturday 30 April 2022

Steven Spielberg, James Bond and the destruction of the world. A to Z

 


As we all know at the end of March on the A to Z practice run myself, Tim, Esmeralda and the massed forces of class 5-ZZ-B2 re-enacted the slightly less know although rather exciting movie “ James Bond and the Zoo Zombies of Zanzibar”. Personally I think of it as one of the all time classic movies in the Bond series.  At the time I wrote: - TO BE CONTINUED:- (30th April) unless I can think of something better? And as it happens I can’t so we will return.



James Bond and the Zoo Zombies of Zanzibar
Staring
Rob ZILLION Tobor as ………… James Bond (Hero)
Tim as ………………… ZORRO the evil arch villain
Esmeralda as…………… ZELDA the arch villains Floozy
And everyone else as……. The ZOMBIES of ZANZIBAR

Directed and produced by………The Dog

So after briefly escaping and stumbling through a forest of letters consisting of almost everything from A to Y Mr Bond is faced with a huge overpowering Z. The secret headquarters of Zorro the master criminal bent on world domination and pointing large Lasers at rather important places, and with menacing demands for lots of Gold (Yes Yes the usual plot Yawn Yawn……… DAM we are not doing Y now).

After stupidly walking in the main entrance dressed as the Pizza delivery man Bond is caught with ease by a scary guard with pointy metal teeth made with an empty cat food tin; and thrown back into the Pit of Doom where the ZOMBIES of ZANZIBAR continue to moan and grown a lot. So yet again we join the conversation as James Bond fights for his life.

 Zorro ……. ZO Mr Bond, Mr ZERO ZERO ZEVEN I have ZOO TRAPPED in ZEE pit of ZOMBIES yet again  HAH ha hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hhahaahahah hahahh hah     

Bond…… You forget Zorro I am Bond I have signed my contract already with the film company for the sequel.

Zorro ……. ZIS time ZOND (Bond) I have spoken with ZEE very nice Steven ZIELBERG (Spielberg) and he says ZOO are a boring ZART

Bond…….. Boring ZART?

Zelda……. Fart Mr Bond AH HAHAH hah hah hahahahah hhah hHHAH AHH HAHAHHAHAH.

Zorro…….. Yes Mr ZOND (Bond), My ZELF and ZELDA ZAID  we will ZIGN a contract and do a ZOMBIE Movie with monsters, Aliens and all sorts of ZINGS

Bond…….. ZINGS?

Zelda……  Things…. Mr Bond are you an IDIOT. Yes the very nice Steven ZIELBERG (Spielberg) was easily persuaded once we had spent the night together in the best traditions of a sexist Bond movie. He says you are boring; a has been, and it is time for you to phone home.

Zorro…... So to make sure Mr ZOND that you die ZIS time. The ZOMBIES of ZANZIBAR are not alone and we have obtained help from many others from ZEE alphabet  HAH HAH HAHH HAHH HAH HHAH HHAH ah hah hhah ha hah hahh hah a

Zelda………. HAH HAHAHH Hah hah hah hah hah haah hhahh hah ahahahahh ha

Bond was not worried he is after all a smug smart arse (OK ass in the USA), but he had not anticipated the arrival in the pit of doom of the following; all determined to put an end to the madness of blogging from A to Z

An AUTOMATED ALUMINIUM AND ANTIMONY ARTICULATED ARMOUR plated ALBINO ARANEOMORPHAE (SPIDER SORT OF THING) ANDROID.

The BANSHEES

A CARNIVOROUS CAVE CRAB of CAMBODIA

The DEMENTED DEADLY DORMICE of DOOM

The ELITE of the EUROPEAN ELLIPTICAL EARTH ENGINE Club

The FIERY FIGHTING FISHERMEN of FISHGUARD.

The GUILD of GROTESQUES AND GARGOYLES

The Ghost of HARRY HOUDINI

The IMPLUSABLE IMPLODING INTERLECTIAL

The legendary JURASSIC JIGANTICIUS JOLLISCARYIUS

The KING of the KELPIES

THE LEMMINGS OF PETRAGRAD

The MYSTERIOUS MUMBLING MUTANT MONSTERS of MESOPOTAMIA

The NEOLITHIC NEMESIS of the NIGHT

An OBSCURE Russian OLIGARCH

A PERPLEXED PINEAPPLE??

QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK …. Yes a Stream Powered Duck.

RUMPELSTILTSKIN

STEVEN SPIELBERG

Clever TREVOR

The UNDEAD

The VENOMOUS VOODOO VAMPIRE VULTURES

WEREWOLF WAVING WHALE parts

A steam powered XENURINE (species of armadillo)

And Professor YAFFLE although it is true to say Mr bond was not worried about the professor to much.

Of course such overwhelming odds resulted in the death of Mr Bond, but what the evil arch villain ZORRO had not anticipated himself was that with the death of our hero the entire Alphabet based world imploded and nothing was left. All vaporized in the blink of an eye …………………………………………. ………………………… ………………………

……………………..

So me and the dog went home singing a song

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Friday 29 April 2022

Professor YAFFLE, the dog and the YORSH

 

The letter Y, which I should have thought about YESTERDAY; YET I didn’t, Why? Well YESTERDAY was YESTERDAY and like YOURSELVES I thought YOU will think of something, YOU'RE YOUNG YOUTHFUL brain will be like that of a Hawk….YARAK (in good condition for hunting). But instead it is YARLING (wailing; howling), I am sure tomorrow when I look back at YESTERDAY (today) I will think YES YOUR mind finally YIELDED a good YARN, but I am not there YET. The dog has just added “YO ho ho and a bottle of YORSH. O dear, if he is drinking that he will be well out of it.

The dog also says we could go and hunt YAPOK (an amphibious opossum of South America) in the YARPHA (peat-bog) with a YATAGHAN (a long curved knife) but I have said it might be easier just to YELL or YODEL in the YARD. As it happens Captain Flint the Parrot is already in the YARD shouting “Man the YARDARM I spy YONDER YAWL (ship's small boat; sailboat carrying mainsail and one or more jibs) Ooo no its just a YUPPY YACHT…. YAH……….. HAR HAR HAR HARDY HAR”

Dad is using YEAST to create a YLEM (in alchemy, substance from which the elements developed) and says if it works he can turn all the YOYO’S into gold but mum said IDIOT.............  YES true but rather helpful.



It also appears the YORSH has got the better of the dog and Captain Flint the Parrot because they are summoning up the dead (OK a deceased Norwegian Blue Parrot) with their new mate the YAFFINGALE  (a Green Woodpecker). They have named him Professor YAFFLE  after you know who, and the dog is telling him “YOU’RE my best mate in all the world YOU are”, but that’s YORSH for YOU.

I can see someone YAWNING now so I will go ……. YIPPEE

Oooo what's in the dirty old bottle........