The Olympic Flame, Mo and a Moth

As you all know Britain, (well London, I think they have forgotten the rest of us now) has been hosting this Olympic sports thing and it appears that the British have been doing remarkably well. Even today, as we come to the end of the penultimate day the Brits are still winning a few medals. Tomorrow is the grand ending with what appears to be a few celebs, well I think they are celebs.  I suspect that the trendy thing to do will now to be seen hanging out doing a bit of sport with a medallist saying things like HAY WE LIKE TO JOG WITH MO JUST TO STAY IN TRIM.

Anyway I did my bit today; after my rather disastrous bonfire yesterday I had another go today. Now this is something I could win medals for in fact I could melt them if I wanted so I made sure that today’s fire was good, very good and that it had at least a full 15ft of flame at times, and all done with non toxic regulation garden stuff and some hedge cutting, no cheating with accelerants and plastic or cardboard. No one wants to be banned on the last full day of competition do they?

I could tell we are near the end of the Olympics because they are running out of sports, for example that modern pentathlon, WHAT? Fencing, swimming, show jumping and running and shooting…….? Yes OK but WHAT?

Then there was that 200m canoe race for one person and then pairs WHAT? How mad is that. You can imagine someone saying ooooo lets go for a canoe trip and they shot off like a motorboat but only as far as the other bank and then they say to you that was fun what’s next before you have even managed to get in a canoe.  And I’m sorry but the BMX just looks silly.  

Anyway the British have done well, and all we need to get through now is the closing ceremony without blowing it somehow, and we can send all those BBC sports reporters back into the darker recesses of obscurity telling them, job well done mate but here is your P45 and thanks….. And I can be grumpy again……….. WELL COOL and tinker in a shed with my new steam powered pole for the pole vault ready for next time…..   

I saw one of these today too, 

But he is still quite safe, and now called MO

HAHAHAHHAHAh hah ah ah hah ah ahah ha hha 

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Fire, Fever, Futility, Frailty and Olympics

I am back, a little frail but back. Not sure what happened yesterday, there I was ticking along moving a huge pile of rock then burning a lot of stuff cleared from the garden minding my own business when ZAP-POW I ran out of steam big time. So I had a sit down and the next thing I know, I have a raging headache and was shivering.

The dog for a long time has been convinced I am an android and said my batteries had finally packed in. His attempt at plugging me into the mains was not a success, nor was stabbing me with a sharp stick to prove I was an android. I think the blood might have finally proved I am not an Android, well I hope it has, that is the second time he has done that although he is muttering something about third time lucky.

I staggered off to bed to recover and because I was so cold I stuck on several jumpers, but when I woke up a couple of hours later I was roasting and was used as a barbeque to cook everyone’s evening meat. Well everyone except me; I was not at my best. 

Anyway I am now back and although a bit frail I am at least fit enough to think about writing my diary. It appears to have been a really lovely day today although I did miss a chunk of it sleeping. The dog has told the neighbours that I am a young alcoholic and have been on the booze again and am best avoided….. . . . . .NOT FAIR. So when I went out and said hello they screamed and ran off locking themselves in their house and were peering at me through the letter box.

So all in all I have done nothing since moving rocks and burning garden rubbish…

Olympics Day three :- Yesterday we were told that Britain winning a silver and a bronze was the start of a huge change of fortune and now the plucky brits have got over the mental scares of that cyclist letting us all down in the road race. Fancy not winning that is terrible, we were all told he was going to win…

I have not had a chance to do a proper check yet to see it we are now heading the medal table but surely we must be…. .. . . . . . . . . . .AH...

The Olympic Torch and other stuff

The Olympic torch went through Welshpool today on its journey round the country, so the school all went down to see it, well all the schools did. I thought it is worth seeing in the flesh as I have to make a cardboard one for the Olympic sculpture with poetry flickering out of the top. It was all rather noisy and seemed like a rather large entourage but then there is the backup flame and then there is a back up to the backup and of course the media and the Olympic flames minders. Napoleon Beelzebub is a bit miffed as it happens because he says if they are going to mess with fire then they should ask him. He is of course quite right and there is not much Mr Beelzebub does not know about fire.

Not long after it passed through town if rained for a while so maybe he was just sort of warning then that one false move and he will bring rain to the Olympics for a couple of weeks, rather than fire and brimstone. So the mention of rain makes it clear that here at least is was a little bit cooler today (phew), although only a little bit. I have not been back on the roof again yet because I have had other things to do although the dog says it is because I am a snivelling coward, as I have pointed out if is easy for him to say that (obviously not very easy for other dogs) but he has got four legs and huge claws and climbing equipment.

The farm next door has now cut all the grass for silage, and as far as I can tell bearing in mind I know nothing about farms it is probably a bumper crop because of the weather, OK I am rambling a bit it is because I am doing stuff and time is limited. Apparently even with the ability to travel in time you do not gain more time so going backwards and forwards may seem like a way of gaining some time but mathematically that is incorrect. I will not expand on this right now because it involves constants and I get enough complaints about going on constantly.

I must go and consider Olympic torches now and how to make poetically correct fire HAH HAH HAH AH HAH HAH HAH HAHH hahah ahahahahahhahaha hahahah.

Ooooo Politics I have not said a lot lately but I am taking notes and have a list of politicians all lined up for a future of Hell and damnation sometime just after they have all been drenched in rain…………. So you are being watched, eternity is a long time in hell……

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