The longer you can’t find something, the stranger the places you start to look for the thing you can’t find. The ghost writer has been on the school roof today and mum found him looking in the armadillo toaster at home. He even dug three holes in our garden and one in Mr Jenkins garden who chased him along the road.
The ghost writer is convinced that his things have been abducted by aliens and that there is a plot by aliens to get him. I hope that is true I haven’t seen the aliens yet but I suspect they might be green (not as in ECO but green as in bright green) with skinny arms and big eyes. If they say take me to your leader I’m not sure if I should take them to see mum or the prime minister, everyone else at school thinks I should take them to see mum and not that other bloke. The other Bloke makes it sound like mums a bloke and that’s not true but then the prime minister is not a woman (I think) although he does have a political partner who is a man, but I don’t understand politics and we don’t mention it here because mum, dad, the corporate sponsors and Steven Spielberg don’t like politics but they do like aliens especially green ones who drink Coca Cola. The ghost writer is now walking up and down the street with a banner that says I HATE ALIENS on one side and GIVE ME BACK MY STUFF on the other written in bright green paint, mum has just said IDIOT and the corporate sponsors have sent Benny Neckbender round to offer him a Coke he cant refuse.
Sooty the Cat is a bit better today but has to wear a collar like a lamp shade to stop him trying to eat all his stitches which would result in him falling in half, sort off. COOL, mum said IDIOT again. I must ask Auntie Karen if Mr Ian the Musical Hat Maker had to wear a collar like a lamp shade to stop him eating his stitches.
By the way mum has made loads of fairy cakes just in case the aliens turn up but the dog says aliens dont like fairy cakes so me and the dog and Rusty the Robot Dog are eating a few YUM just to test them to make sure they taste good….
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