Sunday, 19 June 2011

Sticky air, heavy gravity and twenty minutes in time.....

Well what can I say it has been one of those days today? I did try and do things only I think the air must be sticky today and the forces of gravity higher than normal because we all thought the same. Sort of Phew what’s the time and we all looked at the clock and it said 1:00 pm them hours later having forced our bodies and mind to do things we all look at the clock and it says 1:10 pm WHAT?
We kept doing it and time just slowly ground to a stop in the end dad said he’d had enough and got his flame thrower and torched the clock. Mum was not entirely happy and said IDIOT and made him spend the rest of the afternoon painting the wall again once he had chiselled the remains of the clock off the wall.

The dog and Rusty the Robot dog decided they would be on guard duty today well from 1:15 pm because they said they have seen a pirate in the garden hiding in the shrubs and it was not Pirate Pete who was playing chess with Captain Flint the Parrot, only Captain Flint got the queen and his Brazil nut mixed up and the game sort of got confused. Mind you a pirate and a parrot playing chess using the old Caribbean Offshore Rules is fairly confusing anyway.

Anyway it may be we have pirates in the garden again not sure why yet (I’ll think of something) but it is a bit of a worry. According to the dog he was disguised as  Hercule Poirot, I am not sure whether to believe him or not because he might be just winding up the corporate sponsors who said they will not supply him with free Coca Cola again because five gallons a day is excessive even for a dag. The sponsors are also saying the diary might be OK for a book but they need more action or instead of an action packed thriller full a death defying stunts and cliff hanger moments where we all might die. They will end up with a drama of family life in an old worldly street in a small town in Mid – Wales. They have even implied they might sign a contract with Nelson Beelzebub for the film rights to Nelson Beelzebub’s Very Strange Victorian Curiosity Shop, mum said IDIOTS because it is never a good idea to sign a contract with Mr Beelzebub.
 OK what’s the time 1:20 pm. I think today might last a long time if it has to do the whole twenty four hours I might use the Einstein Cube and take a short cut.   

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