But then after school I had to go to the out of town supermarket with mum and dad and Rusty the Robot Dog who they can’t ban because he’s a robot. And because he has six legs if they say he is a dog dad points out it has six legs and dogs don’t have six legs so he is an insect and they haven’t banned insects.
Anyway although the supermarket is like a sardine tin with all the people, the town is very quiet and all the shops say it’s a very odd year for customers. I have never quite worked out why it is a good idea to have all the shops out of town in the first place surely it makes more sense to have shops in a town; like Napoleon Beelzebub’s Very Strange Victorian Curiosity Shop. But apparently the general public don’t like quirky individual shops and they like all the shops to be the same so a deep fried spicy squid and mash potato sandwich with roast cashew nuts and marsh mallows must look identical in every shop in
One day dad says the multinational branded bland, every shop looking the same will crumble like the Roman empire (I think they were a cinema chain in the fifties) and the individual will once again rule. Dad was standing on a freezer cabinet in the supermarket when he made that speech and although Rusty the Dog, the ghost writer, and two little old ladies cheered we were thrown out and we went home and mum said IDIOT.
Paul Nessman Is the world ending again? I didn't know about the last one until the day it was supposed to have occurred. Good thing too, because if I live one day like it is my last then I might do something that I regret.
Fiona Knight If it is soon to be the end then perhaps we should try becoming part of a gawk of tourists.
Paul Nessman You mean I should wait to give extra treats?...oops. Miss Fiona, congratulations on your apparent promotion...or is that top secret?