Saturday, 31 December 2011

The Greenhouse Effect and the Plankton Plume

Something strange happened last night outside, something very strange. I really should have gone and investigated but I didn’t which in hindsight has turned into an error because now I can never prove what happened, actually happened even if mum and dad saw it as well.  What we saw in the middle of the night well I guess maybe it was about midnight-ish was a strange yellowy green glow coming from the greenhouse. WELL COOL.

And now two different people have told me the same reason for this strange occurrence, the first was the dog this morning, who explained it is a natural effect of nature at this time of year, and it is the Plankton Plume and that Plankton naturally fluoresce so at the right time of year when the Plankton Plume starts the whole sea will glow a bit like the aurora borealis. Mum said IDIOT and pointed out the key word in the dogs explanation was SEA, well it is true there is no sea in the greenhouse. But the dog has pointed out that the greenhouse is quite damp and that new species of Plankton are found all the time and that there has been a lot of discussion about The Greenhouse Effect and its effect on the sea. Mum still said IDIOT though.

I spent the day in Montgomery helping in Napoleon Beelzebub’s Very Strange Victorian Curiosity Shop and Miss Fionaski the Famous Russian Spy came in, when I told her about the glowing greenhouse she said it might be Plankton. Well it must be true then because Miss Fionaski did not know that was what the dog had said; so two independent minds have reached the same conclusion.

What I do know, is next time I see the greenhouse glowing like that in the middle of the night I will do two things, one, take a picture of it and two go and see what it is. After all If I am abducted by aliens it will be great material for the diary and that nice My Steven Spielberg could make a movie about it called mmmmmmmmmm something like Close Encounters of the Third Kind ……… Have I heard that before somewhere?

An awful lot of people came to Napoleon Beelzebub’s Very Strange Victorian Curiosity Shop today to say please Stay we like your shop, but he said THE HELL I WILL and fell about laughing. Mum said that was not good PR but he said I did not get where I am today by being nice and that is certainly true. 

Miss Fionaski the Famous Russian Spy


  1. Actually I am where I am by being nice. I think. That's my version of reality I am willing to defend to the death! Hold it, that didn't sound very nice, okay just forget I wrote that last part. Your post of glow has inspired me to rework a famous poem, I will let you know how it works out or doesn't.

  2. Oh, one more thing: phytoplankton are worth fighting about.

  3. Are you sure you plan to rework a famous poem after all I am only a simple mad person with a blog and I was rather hoping to inspire Steven Spielberg.

    Have you considered changing your name, Steven Spielberg is a very good name particularly for making block buster motion pictures.

  4. Well, I dislike the name Steven because I have a relative by that name, and being 'odd' and wanting to conceal it, I could chop the first two letters off each name and go by Even Ielberg. But then I would be semi-afraid that people would change the vowel sound of the first syllable of the last name, so I would change the spelling to preserve the sounds, so: Even Eelberg

    People who study words would instantly recognize the berg meaning mountain, and then be fascinated by the thought of a mountain made of eels. I know I am right now. The more I think I about it the more I imagine a whole multitude of eel shaped mountain ranges.

    I like to rework old poems as well as create my very own, I just need a good eXcuse to get into a poem writing mood, such as being awake. I am not so much a maker of movies as Steven S but I do have at least one completed screenplay in my head, and it is a dandy of a movie. But it involves too much violence mixed with comedy and I refuse to give serial killers ideas, no matter how brilliant the ideas may be. Producing brilliant comedic-murder-law-enfarcement movies doesn't go along with my main driving force of trying to be the nicest person in the universe. I plan to stick to my silly blog.

  5. Please eXcuse my sentence "I know I am right now." That was NOT s'pposed to be in there! But I have lost my choo-choo of thought as to what was s'pposed to be in that sentence, eXcuse me, I obviously need plenty of strong coffee.

  6. Yes well if you plan to change your name to Even Eelberg then my film will turn into a strange Scandinavian cult film with subtitles which might be OK but there is no money in that.

    And why are you trying to be the nicest person in the Universe with screenplays in your head about murder. It is not possible to be the nicest person in the world, that may sound a bit harsh but its true, no one can be the nicest person in the world.

  7. I know its not possible to be the nicest person in the universe, but I try anyway. I find that it irritates some people very much. I was raised by a mother who taught tiny children most of her life. I should mention that they were tiny because they were in kindergarten, not because they were just short. I suppose mathematically speaking/thinking that there is one person who happens to be the nicest person in the world, but it would be a rather fleeting thing, most difficult to measure, eXcept perhaps in your own mind.

    Have you wrote anything much before you started this blog? I find it delightful.