The royals as in Wills and Kate, the Large Cod and the Montgomery Christmas Window Competition

School is all rather chilled at the moment the art teacher has us producing Potato print wrapping paper, and is selling in the market after school. It is, as the teacher says A nice little earner, personally I thought a nice little earner was what you put flowers in HA HA HA HA HAH HAH HAH HA hhah hah hah ah hahahh hah. I have just had a great idea for a Christmas cracker joke.

Dad is making home made Christmas crackers again this year, although mum insists that he uses less gunpowder than last year. However one of the great things about last years crackers is me and some of my school friends were able to re-enact The Italian Job (the original one not the rubbish remake) and say You’re only meant to blow the doors off. And dad should have warned Mr Jenkins next door before he and Mrs Jenkins pulled the first one.

Look this is all a distraction yet again. I called into Napoleon Beelzebub’s Very Strange Victorian Curiosity Shop on the way home as mum was holding the fort (when I say holding the fort I don’t mean a fort or even a model of a fort I mean ………..O never mind) He says The Angel of the Norse has attracted many comments while it has been in the window, and in fact tonight is judging night for the Montgomery Christmas Window competition…….. Yes well, remember what happened last year but if they will have two little old ladies who are 93 from the WI to judge I think an angel with horns is not going to win.

I was told that the royals as in Wills and Kate (Is that right?) were in Monty last week at the restaurant over the road from Napoleon Beelzebub’s Very Strange Victorian Curiosity Shop.  The one with the Michelin Star; giving food awards named after car tyres is all a bit odd don’t you think.

Of course one of the draw backs to being a royal is you are not allowed to eat in places like Big Bill’s Greasy Fur Ball Café or even the Sun Inn in Marton so you are trapped in a world of places that me and the dog are not allowed in. OK the dog has been banned from Big Bill’s Greasy Fur Ball Café as well now, due to the incident with the leg of lamb and the confusion with the leg of the waiter. But as the dog pointed out close up a leg is a leg, and they all tend to run away screaming at times; and just because on this particular occasion the leg knew the short cut through the kitchen, he was concentrating on getting his dinner.     

Talking of Food  I had Young’s Large cod fillets for tea, this is a sign that cod are becoming extinct because if that was a Large cod we must be down to the tiny weensy baby throw it away its not worth it fish on the grounds we have eaten all the rest. So Christmas tip for tonight is …… eat as many cod as you can before everyone else eats them and there are none left.