Friday, 23 March 2012


I was feeling very optimistic for the letter V; The little old ladies of yesterday were in school today doing Victorian Needlecraft and advanced Voodoo. After their rather Vocal if Vain attempts to kill the Vampires when we were the Undead, sort of making a mockery of “U”.   We were all dressed today as Vampires, so Well Cool. I even took my Ventriloquists Vampire Dummy with me and was practicing on the Bus says things like Very Vice to Veet Voo and A vottle of Veer……….. Veronica said in her opinion I was the Verst Ventriloquist in Vaa  Vorld.  

Victor the Venezuelan Van (Bus) driver said the Venezuelan Villagers Venerate the Vampires and often hang a Vulture or a Viking on their doors for the visiting vampire who will vibrate the doors on the darkest nights when nothing is visible. After running over a Vixen then a Vole and then a Violin Virtuoso who was playing Vivaldi by the Vineyard we arrived at School.

As yesterday the band of little old ladies, plus the Vicar were there and they Shouted it’s the Venomous Vindictive violent vaporous UNDEAD……….. What? Undead, we said we are Vampires we were the Undead Yesterday, but they Shouted KILL THE UNDEAD, KILL THE UNDEAD. Throwing Valuable Vincent Van Goth’s (sorry Gogh) pictures plus a Vermeer, a Venetian Vase and a Vast number of empty Vodka bottles at us.  The Vicar shouted Vanquish the UNDEAD, Vanish, Vamoose. And we said We are not the Undead we are Vampires………………... Miss Violet said she thought they were Victimizing Vus (sorry Us). They were last seen all heading to the Vestry at the Vicarage.   

The headmaster was dressed as Lord Voldemort, only the Vanilla V neck vest top made him look more like a Vagabond, Esmeralda said as she was a  Vampire she would bite the veins of Voldemort (The Headmaster). But it turned out that Voldemort’s blood was too Viscous

Anyway after it was discovered a visiting Viscount and his wife the had a virulent Virus we were all doused in Vinegar in the Vaults and sent home.

Venison and Veal Pie with garlic for tea YUM …………….AH apparently is Vegetarian Pie with Vegetables and garlic ……….YUCK

 Too many Verbs and Vowels for a VENTRILOQUIST……. A gottle of gear……..Mum just said GIDIOT (sorry IDIOT).  

Ooooo by the way I never mentioned Venus ................... AH I just did  


1 comment:

  1. "V" - that vvas my faVorite thing that Churchill eVer said in a hand gesture.