Tuesday, 5 April 2022

The Demented Deadly Dormice of Doom

10 years ago this was my first-ish A to Z. A time when I wrote a diary in a rather distinctive style as the eccentric child of cyberspace . . . . . I say first-ish because I did a practice run in March 2012 so I sort of did it twice.

A little Mad but then doing the A to Z can drive a chap mad. 

 

The Letter D




DamN
it appears the Department of Demons and Demonic Diseases has depressed dad saying we have a dodgy infestation of the demented Deadly Dormice of Doom in the dinning Room. Disposed of by  (Well Dropped)  by a Dutch Drunkard from his duffel bag; who had been drinking, and dancing  with the dog on the doorstep in the dead of night, celebrating the Death of the Diamond  Duchess of Demark in 1871 (hang on I know that year from the A to Z list). The demented Deadly Dormice of Doom have dug down into the dark dank decaying depths of the draughty dungeons (OK the Cellar).  Definitely adding to the difficulty and discomfort of a diabolically dodgy drove of deadly doomsday animals and Androids.





Mum says it’s a disgrace and has sent the dog down to dislodge them, (ARNOLD the ANDROID ANARCHIST, the Carnivorous Cave Crab of Cambodia and The demented Deadly Dormice of Doom).

After much discussion and debate and a bit of despair, the dog has disembowelled a couple of the demented Deadly Dormice of Doom who have raised the white flag (a dirty white flag) and are departing dispirited and in dishonour. It appears the Carnivorous Cave Crab of Cambodia is depressed due to a sudden downpour of deep snow (SNOW……..WHAT?????)  and the AUTOMATED ALUMINIUM AND ANTIMONY ARTICULATED ARMOUR plated ALBINO ARANEOMORPHAE ANDROID (ARNOLD the ANDROID ANARCHIST) is suffering from distemper and is asking for Doughnuts and Dolly Mixture. And says just because they look like the devil doesn’t mean they are degenerates and it is definitely discrimination of deadly demons and Androids. And that it is dehumanizing. ……….Well if you’re not a human, although I guess he was ANTHROPOMORPHIC

ANTHROPOMORPHIC hang on I’m back at A again how did that happen ……..Mum has added IDIOT (sorry Dimwit) …… I blame the snow.



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