Being a pupil; head boy as it
happens (as you should all know) at a post modernist cyber-Academy somewhere in
cyberspace, has certain advantages to that of a traditional school. You see on
a hot sunny summer’s day when the students, and teachers for that matter are ambling
about aimlessly bumping into one another and accidently sawing cats in half in
the woodwork class, the health and safely officer can send everyone home on the
spur of the moment. . . . So he did, on the grounds that he fancied a nice
chilled day, I think more schools need to think like this it is great for
student and teacher morale and a sunny day helps intelligence, (a well know
fact).
At home I
decided that it was time to attack and destroy three monsters in the garden
three large green monsters known to all as The Three Bishops. These three
monsters have been staring at us for some time now biding their time waiting
for a loss of concentration so that they could pounce. Now none of us have got
it in for Bishops in particular, but even a Bishop can be in the wrong place
and so out came the chainsaw and I chopped then up and will burn the Bishops in
the next few days. It is not everyone who gets to set fire to a Bishop.
In other news
it appears that while I was busy doing battle chopping the arms and legs off
Bishops aliens had left a sign in the fields to the side and behind us in the
grass. Creating interesting geometric shapes which Mr Jones insists are telling
him they wish make contact with the government and that we should phone the
prime Minister and get him here pronto. He would of course do it himself but
apparently they have blocked his phone and told him rather unfairly that he is
a raving IDIOT, OK he might be a little over enthusiastic but not a raving IDIOT.
And you can’t deny we have a field full of interesting geometric shapes
suddenly turned up today out of nowhere.
Oooooo yes if
anyone is wondering where the dog is at present he is on a sabbatical; being large
and from the South American Jungle with red eyes and also fluent in Latin he
felt he needed to go and chat to the Pope and advise him on stuff; and maybe
nibble the odd saints bones to authenticate them.
I don't think it aliens that left those interesting shapes. I think it might be magic or to be more pricise - a magical tractor.
ReplyDeleteI saw a magical tractor once... wait for it... it went down the road and TURNED into a field. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA.. sorry.
Now look here Mr H here I am trying to put some scientific evidence together to help the pro aliens are hiding in my Wheelie bin lobby and you go and mention magic tractors. . . . . really its a rum do if you ask me.
DeleteOooooo on the subject of wheelie bins they would be the perfect disguise for the new Tardis. they are all over the place and never get a second look.
Keep Watching the Skies (Not Tractors).
I would use a wheelie bin but due the fact the council stole mine last month it could put a spanner in the works for the production office if it happened again!
DeleteWhat manner of witchcraft is this, I ask thee??
ReplyDeleteAnd I was wondering what had happened to the dog. :)
Yes the dog who is after all several hundred years old was a whole film in his own right. So has gone walkabout until the rest of us have run out of stuff to write about.
DeleteI am not clever enough to hold a tale together with everyone in, and to record everyone's day would be hundreds of words a day.
If a red button keeps the weather decent, then please, please, please keep on pushing. I could fall asleep staring at your photos :)
ReplyDeleteRight then, what did I just read? Time to go dance with the unicorns.....
Dancing with unicorns is not something I have done, although I have juggled with acorns. I say juggled I really mean dropped them on the floor.
DeleteWonderful read , I always leave your post until last so I can end the day with a smile.
ReplyDeleteLoved the garden by the way.
Yvonne.
The garden has much work to be done on it we have plans for a posh Moroccan courtyard. Although not having any money I have to do all the work myself.
DeleteI am glad you are still enjoying the blog.
Do think aliens wiLL ever start using algebraic shapes instead of geometric? I was reaLLy eXpecting some equations by now ...
ReplyDeleteI am sure there are many very clever aliens but we are all just too far apart.
DeleteThe ones who do find us are in fact just scribbling maps trying to work out how to get back on the intergalactic super highway, they then leave them to amuse all the bald apes that keep running about fighting.
Maybe they don't even notice us and they use the earth for sculpture. Perhaps Earth may one day be a child alien's art project on a gigantic refrigerator door somewhere (turn your head left 13 degrees right and then look up 5 degrees) over there millions of light years in front of you. Joke: What brand of refrigerator do aliens buy?
DeleteAnswer: AnETa instead of an A-man-a
Hahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahah a.
They buy then in Comet . . . . . OK Comet went bust and ruined that joke.
DeleteI am happy to be sculpture, part of a famous Michael-alien-joe
Agree!
DeleteDo NOT press the red button! If I've learned anything from movies its that red buttons always cause explosions, and I don't fancy any explosive weather right now. A nuclear winter in the middle of summer is simply not on.
ReplyDeleteWhat you mean this Red Button Mr Addman . . . . . . . . . .AH DAMN, sorry about that.
Delete