I have not achieved a great deal
today, it has been that sort of day I looked at a little job involving some
tongue and groove panelling but did not have the things I needed, so sort of
waved the various bits about shook my head a lot pointed and said OOOOO sorry madam it needs a new thermitechnic screw
adjuster like all good plumbers and then said I would be back two weeks next Thursday. However mum said I
was not a plumber I was an IDIOT and sent me out to do things elsewhere, but I
knew where here was and I knew where there was but I could not find elsewhere.
Despite asking everyone I ran into (I say ran into I was walking and did not make
any physical contact) such as the Banshees and the Lemmings of Petrograd, who
were playing leap frog ( Lemmings, leap frog . . . . .HAH HAHAHHAHAHH HAH ha
hah ah hah ah ahahhah ha ha ha) a few Zombies, a few Cows, a Raven, The Dark
Creature of the Undergrowth, Mr Jones, Esmeralda and Freddie who have formed a
new group called ‘Watching Alien Invasion Tactics’ or WAIT for short.
Apparently Mr Jones often chases aliens through the woods shouting WAIT . . . . . . take
me to your leader.
Hang on what was I saying . . . . . . AH YES elsewhere; when I asked
everyone I was looking for elsewhere they would generally scratch their heads
ask if I meant here and when I said no they would suggest over there but I was
not looking for there I was looking for elsewhere. I spent a lot of time doing
that until I worked out I had been here there and everywhere, although not
elsewhere. You can see how a chaps day can vanish like sand through the fingers
of a little old ladies hand when perusing such a task, strangely it is the sort
of task us chaps will do for hours and women tend not too even for five minutes,
although I don’t know why?
In other news I
noticed on the news that a man who I believe was a captain of Star Trek although
not Captain Kirk (the real captain) was going on about never eating a pizza
slice before even though he is now seventy, although he has eaten pizza. Now
call me an IDIOT but me and the Ghost Writer who is well old, are well confused
what is a pizza slice if it is not a pizza, If either of use go out a
restaurant and order a pizza we want the whole thing not a bit of it. As I say the poor old Ghost Writer (note the
word OLD) and I don’t understand what they were talking about.
Oooo I was a
bit rushed for a picture tonight so I photographed my dinner (I know it is a
bit healthy looking) and it is not pizza.
I don't think I know where aLL elsewheres are, but I do know where the r is in elsewhere. Oh, sorry, interruption, must feed Cooper ... ok, back again. I was thinking also that any where that there was someone named Elle who swears would also be an Elleswear. I hope this helps and if it doesn't please don't let me know. (Hahahahaha) oh, sorry there was another interruption from a phone caLL telemarketer. When I told him I had lots of money and asked him hoow much he wanted, he said something eXtremely rude about my sister. He didn't specify which one. Then he hung up.
ReplyDeleteI think if you cut a pizza up in rings from the middle outward, I am not sure that I would caLL that a slice. The neXt time I order pizza I wiLL ask my waitress to cut my pizza into ring starting with a circle in the middle, and I wiLL formulate the 5 radius dimensions in order to have six equal pieces of pizza.
DeleteLogically it would make more sense to make square pizza's maybe called Plazza's.
DeleteYou don't have loads of money Mr ESB . . . . . . . . DAMN
I worked out the math, you just make the cuts proportional to the square roots of the integers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 with an outside diameter of 6. The neXt time I order a pizza I should ask them not to slice it then I can bring it home and do the circle ring ring ring ring ring thing. It would work out perfectly for Cooper as he likes the outer crust and I don't.
DeleteI think you need to do this and photograph it as an example geometry in pizza . . . sort of like poetry in motion only with more bite....
DeleteYes, I was already planning a demo, trying to decide what to use for a cutting device to give nice sharp circles and which toppings out of my favorites, plus how to arrange the rings for photos .... aLL this while Cooper is complaining, "Why is it taking so long to serve my pizza?!?!?"
DeleteSometimes I get confused.com reading your post but I so enjoy them, I go to bed with a smile on my face.
ReplyDeleteYvonne.
I will admit they are not always straight forward, and sometimes I find I need to return a few days later and tweak them as I tend to notice errors then.
DeleteBut it is good that they make you smile it is what my blog is all about (well one of the reasons I do it).
Finding out where elsewhere is is a grand undertaking. However, do you think you could find when erstwhile is while you're at it?
ReplyDeleteI think we could end up searching in earnest for erstwhile, luckily though Mr ESB above ( a fellow member of RATs) is called Ernest.
DeleteI have been eating chocolate cake Mr Addman so all is well.
I think I went to elsewhere once, but I can't for the life of me remember how to get there. Funny place, though.
ReplyDeleteI went to college in Ware once a long time ago and I don't think I could find Ware now.
Delete