The Alien Virus, Olympic Gold and the missing trees

I have had a better day today sort of, I woke up to the faces of the dog and Mr Jones staring at me, they say I have had an alien virus caught in the woods. I have a metallic green face and arms (although I did find two tins of car spray paint hidden under my bed later on). And I had grown antennae, but again later I noticed that the aerials from my short wave radios were missing and I found a used tube of super glue hidden with the spray cans. I think this may also explain why I appear to have rubber suction pads at the end of all my fingers.

I was not expecting to find Mr Jones peering at me with the dog but it appears the dog let him in through the window too show him my strange alien disease, although he did charge Mr Jones £150 to see me, and £25 a picture.

I am not sure what day we are up to with the Olympics now I think it is day five, and it appears to all be going to plan with the British team. How did that happen? This is Britain things like that don’t happen in Britain, it is not traditional; maybe someone should shout COME ON TIM. I am a bit out of all this so all I can say from what I know is three men rode round and round very fast indeed.  Some men went down a fake river very fast indeed, a man shot loads of clay things although I believe it took some time.

The bad news was a British woman overtook another British woman too soon and this meant they were eliminated, but a Chinese woman overtook a Chinese woman too soon and got silver. It appears if you are going to do this it is important to do it in the right race. This may explain why I was banned from the last egg and spoon race at school.

Finally I believe a lot of swimmers have been getting wet in the pool. I don’t think the British have been doing too well in the pool because of this (I have to admit I have sort of lost the plot with not being 100% so I may be wrong). But I am sure I heard a British rail team trainer explaining to the press that the reason was, it is the wrong sort of water. 

  

Oooooooo yes since I was last compos mentis two large trees have vanished from our garden, the dog and Mr Jones say ALIENS but mum has added IDIOTS. 

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