Sunday, 19 February 2012

Fox News .... Professor Abraham van Helsing revels all in The Sun on Sunday. Meanwhile another branch of Shrubs is axed



After another game of paper scissors stone I found myself pruning two rather large shrubs near the top of our garden, close to the drive, OK yes that makes us sound like we live in some sort of yuppy mansion. As you know we don’t, we live in classic 1970’s bungalow with over sized UPVC double glazed windows previously owned by a little old lady for something approaching thirty years. So while I pruned (not the fruit, but with a saw) everyone else was painting a room a dark mulberry colour.  

As you all know we do not entirely like the inside of our house white, so dark mulberry is much better. There is a great master plan which mum and dad have although I am not allowed to know master plans because they say I then put them in my diary, but I have explained that is the whole point of a diary.

OK yes the pruning why is it what looks like a small branch when attached to a large shrub turns out to be huge when it is falling towards you from a great height and then takes three people to shift it.  Unfortunately there was only me as the dog said it was not a bone and therefore of no interest although he did rattle out some sort of Latin name for the shrub adding Yo Ho Ho Three men in a Shrub.

On the wireless I noticed that Mr Murdoch from News International is saying he plans to have a new Sunday newspaper to replace the News of the World called The Sun on Sunday. Napoleon Beelzebub has just added oooo yes that reminds me I better do some paperwork just in CASE; I am not sure what that means.  Now you will be thinking why mention this, but I have a reason. In cyberspace one of my followers (now I sound like some sort of leader ….. I am not) a Mr Van Helsing or Batman to his friends, has told me that I wrongly accused the Fox of chewing off the leg of Elvis (that’s Spy Elvis not the one on the moon) and it was in fact the Squirrels so I think I need to contact Mr Murdoch as I think I have his first major headline for the first edition of the Sun on Sunday.

“Breaking News Fox innocent, Squirrels chewed off the leg of Elvis. Batman revels all.”

 Professor Abraham van Helsing says its a dam shame, that News International has had the life blood sucked out of it. Luckily I sold my stake in the company some time ago and bought commodities in particular silver bullets, things are looking Grave.

Apparently Ex News International reporter Mr Vamp is available for hire HAAHAH HAHAH HAH AHHA HHAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HHAH HAhah hah hahaha haha hhah hah ha …………. …… AH ………………. …………………….. ……………………. Mum says IDIOT

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16 comments:

  1. esbboston19 February 2012 at 18:47

    I was con fused by your paragraph number three, was that s'pposed to be a small bush instead of a shall bush? .... Back to more reading ....

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    Replies
    1. Rob Z Tobor19 February 2012 at 18:52

      Thanks I will correct. proof reading yourself is not easy...

      Delete
    2. Rob Z Tobor19 February 2012 at 18:55

      Thanks Mr ESB Job done

      Delete
  2. Tony Van Helsing19 February 2012 at 22:06

    You don't want to be listening to Abraham Van Helsing, he is not what he seems.

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    Replies
    1. Rob Z Tobor20 February 2012 at 15:03

      I know cyberspace is like that. And well at the end of the day we all like a friendly campfire (sorry Vampire)

      Delete
  3. Sue20 February 2012 at 00:50

    Hi Rob, Sue here - If you'd like me to give you a bit of a hand with the hyperlink signature, could you email me please - I can't see your address (but prob just being blind) You made a comment on the A-Z blog that sounded like it wasn't working for you... these signatures can be recalcitrant little sods! suetravers01atgmaildotcom
    cheers
    Sue

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rob Z Tobor20 February 2012 at 15:05

      Many thanks for the offer I will just sulk about in the backwaters of cyberspace for now. But I appreciate the offer of help.

      Delete
  4. Aysh20 February 2012 at 15:41

    I like how your parents refuse to tell you information as they fear you'll put it in your diary!! Probs just incase you decide to release a book about your life in the future filled with all the embarrassing things they've done :P

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  5. esbboston20 February 2012 at 18:39

    Hi Aysh !!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aysh20 February 2012 at 23:35

      Hiya :D fancy seeing you here :O

      Delete
    2. Rob Z Tobor20 February 2012 at 23:38

      How look here chaps concentrate on the plot no chatting in the stalls

      Delete
    3. Rob Z Tobor20 February 2012 at 23:40

      Now look here; not "How" stupid qwerty keyboard .......grrrrrrr

      Delete
    4. esbboston21 February 2012 at 04:48

      Hi Rob !!! Hope you got your asdfgh keyboard fixed.

      Delete
    5. Aysh22 February 2012 at 17:42

      My old nokia n97 mini had the best qwerty keyboard in the world!

      Delete
    6. Rob Z Tobor25 February 2012 at 21:09

      Hi people sorry I am running out of time and missing replies I really need the best qwerty keyboard in the world, as it happens the one I use is quite good an old IBM thing, We have loads of old computers here Ooooooo about 10 to 15 maybe but all old. Its the Ghost writer fault he has computers stashed all over the place (still old but he loves old)

      Delete

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