Tuesday, 9 April 2013

Harpies, Hercules and Hungarians

The Slightly eccentric A to Z blogging adventure of unknown and rather unpopular Modern fairy tales

H Harpies, Hercules and Hungarians 

We have all heard of the Harpies, the daughters of Thaumas and Electra who would be very naughty and had a habit of stealing all the food of Phineus, the king of Thrace, things like halibut, herring, hotdogs, haggis, and ham sandwiches, but few have heard of Henrietta the Happy Harpie. Horrified by the horrendous habits of her sisters (the three other Harpies). Henrietta the harpie hid in the hills and helped humble hobbits to tie their hobnail boots up and help hedgehogs to cross the road, and Hoover and trim hedges. Then one day her sisters said they were having a holiday and would visit Henrietta at her home in the hills . . . . . .Help thought Henrietta who knew the hobbits and hedgehogs were hardly going to be happy so she hatched a plan. She invited Hercules, Homer and Horus to her house.

When the harbingers of horror and hazardous hazards arrived at the home of Henrietta the happy Harpie to harass her she introduced Homer who said he would read history for hours and hours to the three Harpies to help. Then Horus howled from the hut on the hillside, the three harpies do not like Horus because he’s HALF a hawk and half an Egyptian hieroglyphic and he howls better than they do.  Then Hercules (famous for his fight with the Hydra) wearing a handmade hat and hoola skirt offered them hot chocolate and hobnobs, apparently Harpies hate hobnobs.

To make matters worse for the three  horrible harpies, a herd of hyena and a  huge husky started to laugh hysterically at them, so the three horrid harpies said our heads hurt we have had enough of this hullaballoo we are heading home to Hampstead Heath.

As they flew home they were tempted to harass a group of tourists on holiday at a hotel and stole all their hamburgers, but even this did not go as planned as the hotels guests were Hungarian tourists who set fire to the three Harpies. After all, if there is one thing we all know, it is that Hungarians love a big  Hot bowl of Hungarian Ghoul-Ash……… HA HA HA HA HAH HAH AH haha hh haha hah hah hhah ahahah ahah ah h haha haha ha hahaha hahahahahaha hahaha

And the three Horrid Harpies were never seen again.




  1. I had no idea that Horus was half Hawk and half Egyptian Hieroglyphic.
    I'm learning something new from these posts everyday. Who said the interweb is useless...oh,that was me. :)

    1. I think he is. . . .

      I must admit that for this task I am speed data-ering so quite frankly most of what I say is rubbish. By the interweb is indeed a place of knowledge but also rubbish

  2. So, HONESTLY. this was a little HARD to HANDLE for this HUMBLE HOUSEWIFE who was (H)unfamiliar with HARPIES, HERCULES and HUNGARIANS! HAPPY blogging!


    1. AH damn that's all a bit of a worry because I will turn up tomorrow. When I say I, I refer to the letter I not me (I) in person.

      Thanks for commenting and hanging in there and good luck, still a long way to go yet.

  3. Lol it's almost Hard to read this Harpie tale with all the H's.. I think my I's are crossing.. Oh wait - that's tomorrow.

    Happy 2nd week!

    AJ Lauer
    #atozchallenge helper minion
    Twitter: @ayjaylauer

    1. Good luck being a minion, I decided it was enough just to post, so I do wish you well as we are starting to reach the point where the stragglers will have to be left to be eaten by huge pointy teethed monsters.

      Taking of which were is the mirror.

  4. Harpies Hate Hobnobs? I have learnt something today ;D And the Horror-pun seemed to induce a lot of Hysterical Ha-Ha-ing...Hurray! (I don't care that it's "i" day now, obviously)

    1. I do a lot of Ha Ha Ha-ing but that is only because most readers quietly sit and shake their heads. It is also the reason why I am not a stand up or even a sit down comic.

      It is true about Harpies and Hobnobs, I think they prefer Ginger Nuts. . . . .