Tuesday, 12 February 2013

One man and his painted human silhouette . . . .

A mite on the cold side again.  . . . .DAMN

Just at present I feel I am staggering through a barren desert devoid of events and interesting things to write about; yes I know that we have a Pope and horses turning up in convenience foods, and Esmeralda has realigned the steam powered catapult so that the school goat landed in the large DIY store and became deranged from sniffing glue. I say sniffing I should possibly say chewing cans of glue. I don’t recommend letting a goat get deranged in a DIY store full of power tools and no frozen peas, I never even knew a goat could operate a chainsaw, I guess all those hours in the woodwork department have not been entirely wasted.

But the point is in the present state of limbo news and events are thin on the ground, and at this rate I will be telling you about Freddie’s new re-enactment of One man and his Dog, but who in their right mind wants to read about Freddie’s revival of the old show rounding up sheep and getting them into a pen at the bottom of a large field. Although in Freddie’s case he used his two best ferrets and the little old ladies from the Bingo bus and rounded them up into the trolley pen at the bottom of the large Supermarket car park.   

But you really don’t want to hear all about that, and I was a bit distracted anyway because I had painted a human silhouette on the car park near the disabled bays and was doing rather well making a few pounds doing the Richard the Third tourist trail reciting famous lines like “a trolley a trolley my kingdom for a decent trolley that does not squeak and pull to the left” and “Alas poor checkout operative I knew them well”.

AH right where was I OH Yes, the bitter cold long dark winter (ooooo yes “This is the Winter of our discounted Tent . . . 50% off”)  . . . . Sorry distracted again. I was saying the cold long dark winter where everyone has got their head down and nothing is happening and as a result has left me in a state of crisis with nothing to write about having arrived home late due to the escaped flock of Wildebeest that escaped from the processed food factory and were running towards the bypass holding up all the traffic including the school bus. And these new improved android bus drivers are rubbish, just because class 15AS set fire to Mr Harris the bus driver a couple of times.

Ok that’s it I will not subject you to the verbal equivalent of watching paint dry any longer and I will go and see if I can see that big hawk outside the house again, I was going to take a picture of it for you but in an act of defiance something that Hawks, Popes and Richard the Third are rather good at it flew away.  The pope does this too but Richard the Third takes a more Ostrich approach to defiance than a hawks approach to defiance. As Richard would say himself “An honest tale speeds best, being plainly TOLD BY Rob Z Tobor




  1. The most exciting thing to happen up here is the new bus shelter Arriva have put up for the number 70 to Shrewsbury.
    It is quite a nice bus shelter. The best I've ever seen actually, but still - its not Richard the third or horse meat or the pope giving his four week notice.
    I think we have been spoilt with high profile news these past few months. I think we're all newsed out.

    1. You may have to tell us tales of your holiday again Mr H all that getting through customs trying to look innocent, when you have in fact smuggled that friendly gecko that ran about on your bedroom wall into the UK only to see it escape on the services on the M6.

      Burger King is no place for a small gecko with only a few words of English available to him, particularly when horse meat gives him a rash.

      Hang ON Mr H what am I talking about.

      I dont know what number bus goes to Shrewsbury from our side of the big city (OK town) but we dont have a nice bus shelter, I suspect few people take the bus from here, so Arriva has thought SOD EM. We dont get to Shrewsbury much not since on-line shopping saves a gallon of fuel. Just think there is a huge world of cyberspace out there and you are a stones throw up the road.

    2. Don't you start throwing stones at me young man. I shall tell the naughty police and they shall have very harsh words with your parents.
      I do like shrewsbury. Its no manchester 'cos theres only one comic shop. but it is a very good comic shop and I have met the guy who draws the zombies in the walking dead comic a few times. And they do a nice bit of superhero cake as well.

    3. Sorry about the Stones Mr H and Manchester is a bit lively for me, I would get lost. I don't know where the comic shop is in Shrewsbury but If I wait for all the other shops to close I will eventually find it.

      oooo I have never had superhero cake.

  2. I like your, Well, I am Shakespeare.

    Not much here at the moment, just baking.

  3. Ooh...sorry, just got distracted by all the little nick knacks in that top picture.

    Well I'm currently eating a hot cross bun, whilst researching Lemmings, if anyone wants anything newsworthy. The little man is convinced that they're depressed and therefore suicidal and all they need is a good dose of anti-depressants to stop em from jumping off cliffs. :)

    1. We have a myriad of little nick nacks and when all else fails I can go and take a picture of something for the diary entry.

      Tell Lil man that Lemmings are small enough that if they leap of cliffs they just bounce. The Lemmings of Petrograd love to leap off a cliff. . . They particularly like to leap off Cliff Richard because they know it really annoys him.

      And of course as a result of the bravery of the Lemmings of Petrograd it was renamed in 1924 (I think) to Lemming-grad

    2. He's not convinced, even after we watched a clip on youtube and could see that they were quite clearly alive after jumping.

      Great thing is, if you look up Lemmings on google, your posts come up. :)

    3. He really does not need to worry about the lemmings leaping off cliffs they have far greater problems like being bite sized to rather a lot of other beasts and rather tasty when added to a frozen lasagne.

      I do not come up on my own Google search of Lemmings but am pleased to know that I do elsewhere.