Tuesday, 12 February 2013
One man and his painted human silhouette . . . .
A mite on the cold side again. . . . .DAMN
Just at present I feel I am staggering through a barren desert devoid of events and interesting things to write about; yes I know that we have a Pope and horses turning up in convenience foods, and Esmeralda has realigned the steam powered catapult so that the school goat landed in the large DIY store and became deranged from sniffing glue. I say sniffing I should possibly say chewing cans of glue. I don’t recommend letting a goat get deranged in a DIY store full of power tools and no frozen peas, I never even knew a goat could operate a chainsaw, I guess all those hours in the woodwork department have not been entirely wasted.
But the point is in the present state of limbo news and events are thin on the ground, and at this rate I will be telling you about Freddie’s new re-enactment of One man and his Dog, but who in their right mind wants to read about Freddie’s revival of the old show rounding up sheep and getting them into a pen at the bottom of a large field. Although in Freddie’s case he used his two best ferrets and the little old ladies from the Bingo bus and rounded them up into the trolley pen at the bottom of the large Supermarket car park.
But you really don’t want to hear all about that, and I was a bit distracted anyway because I had painted a human silhouette on the car park near the disabled bays and was doing rather well making a few pounds doing the Richard the Third tourist trail reciting famous lines like “a trolley a trolley my kingdom for a decent trolley that does not squeak and pull to the left” and “Alas poor checkout operative I knew them well”.
AH right where was I OH Yes, the bitter cold long dark winter (ooooo yes “This is the Winter of our discounted Tent . . . 50% off”) . . . . Sorry distracted again. I was saying the cold long dark winter where everyone has got their head down and nothing is happening and as a result has left me in a state of crisis with nothing to write about having arrived home late due to the escaped flock of Wildebeest that escaped from the processed food factory and were running towards the bypass holding up all the traffic including the school bus. And these new improved android bus drivers are rubbish, just because class 15AS set fire to Mr Harris the bus driver a couple of times.
Ok that’s it I will not subject you to the verbal equivalent of watching paint dry any longer and I will go and see if I can see that big hawk outside the house again, I was going to take a picture of it for you but in an act of defiance something that Hawks, Popes and Richard the Third are rather good at it flew away. The pope does this too but Richard the Third takes a more Ostrich approach to defiance than a hawks approach to defiance. As Richard would say himself “An honest tale speeds best, being plainly TOLD BY Rob Z Tobor”