Friday, 26 September 2014

ITV1+1, the Time Lords and Time . . . Mankinds big Questions



I was asked what at first appears to be a simple question about names yesterday. . . . . . . Why isn't ITV1+1 just called ITV2 . . . . . .  It’s an innocent sort of thought but under the surface lays a terrible secret.   You see ITV1+1 is in fact one of the time shift channels created to manipulate mankind, as a programme ends on ITV1 it suddenly turns up on ITV1+1. Very useful folk will think a chance to watch the programme you have just missed and were looking foreword too.

But this apparently simple and popular idea is a way to control time, ask yourself where does this extra hour come from that allows a TV channel to move programmes about like this. The fact is that these huge media companies have devised a way to bend time, allowing them to create the 25hr a day television experience.


Now just ask yourself this question what device do you use to check the correct time, is it granddads grandfather clock wound up religiously every two days that stands in the hallway out of direct sunlight. Or is it some sort of media device such as the radio or a mobile phone or a PC, are you planning to rush out and buy the new iWatch. You see all these devices with the exception of  granddads grandfather clock are under the control of Western imperialist corporate multinationals that are keen to turn us all into Zombies working long hours to produce more media devices so we can watch more repeated programming.

   ITV1+1 is just the thin edge of the wedge once +2 +3 +4 and so on arrive we will be so confused by the constant watching of the same soap or reality show repeated at what appears to be the same time our willpower will be destroyed.  We will then be Zombies forced to work as slaves eating 15minute meals and removing stains that no other detergent can shift. 


Remember the book, film, play and board game 1984, remember that saying that folk like to quote  . . . . . BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU . . . . .  and what is the device everyone plans to rush out and buy at great cost the minute it arrives in the shops . . . the iWatch . . . . . Exactly I rest my case (that’s the long case of Granddads grandfather clock which says it is midday exactly. . . . is it meant to be this dark?   

8 comments:

  1. It could also be ITVeleven.

    I checked my iPhone just now and it is possible to take your phone off The Grid. I just now took it off and manually forced the time to be 1 minute off, slow of course. We will see how accurate it is over time or how long it takes to be 1+1 minutes different than The Grid.

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    1. I laughed at your sentence, "Big Brother is watching us", because they are constantly changing our clocks, they are re-"watch"-ing us.

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    2. Taking your iPhone off grid sounds like a good idea, in fact it is something you can use to your advantage if you are late for a meeting. Just show people and say look its an iPhone so it must be the right time. Of course this is the very same cunning plan that the mutantationals sorry thats multinationals have. . . . .

      I dont think that . . . . Big Brother is iWatching you. . . . . is going to catch on as a marketing idea for apples new device.

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    3. OOooooo I may have a new word Mr ESB mutantationals . . . do you like it I can see it might appeal to you as a word.

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  2. It's all just part of the governments scheme to turn us into a Zombie Nation.

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    1. It is Miss Lily very much so in fact I think they have kidnapped Mr H, he was on some secret mission at the time.

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  3. It's more sinister than I had thought. Will we be slow moving zombies, or the fast type of zombies? The 1984 board game was a bit rough. All that double think, it went on interminably. My siblings and I never got to the point of Oceania beating Eurasia, we just ended up alcoholics. (Orwell jokes!)

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    1. I think the link to 1984 means they must be slow Zombies they all move about slowly as far as I remember from the film, shouting four legs good two legs bad. . . . AH I might be a bit confused.

      Gosh you are a clever soul and know stuff. Most of my regulars are clever people which is ironic because I'm an IDIOT and make it all up and hope for the best.

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