I have not done a lot today because of the
bug; I have sort of pottered about slowly making groaning sounds. I briefly
poked about at one of our clocks which has a habit of chiming randomly at odd
times. It is OK though because it only has the hour hand and a completely blank
face so it is almost impossible to tell the time anyway, which means you don’t
know if it chimed at the right or wrong time.
I have also learnt from my good friend Miss Fionaski the famous Russian
spy that the world is due to end on the 21st December so we will be
putting our Christmas tree up this weekend in order to make the most of it. I
forgot to ask how the world is due to end which was silly of me it would be useful
to know whether I should duck or leap into a ditch or climb a tree or eat loads
of food to avoid it. I think I may wear subdued
clothing on the 21st Dec because I think wearing bright clothing
will only make it worse and if it involves aliens you would stand out like a
sore thumb, surely a big mistake with aliens destroying the world.
I have also been told by
another friend that I might be standing on the pivot point of the universe and
that I need to shuffle about a bit to keep it balanced correctly, not an easy
thing at present when suffering from the side effects of Man Flu. But I did
wonder if these two things are interlinked and maybe aliens are keen to rule
the universe, and have decided that the best way to do this is control of the
most strategic point in the universe, which would be the universes pivot point.
Normally I would not worry to much about
this, but if I am the pivot point then I will need to think of a cunning plan
before the 21st Dec.
OK I am off again now,
there is only so much a man with Man Flu can write. . . . . AAAAAuuuuuughggghghghghghghghhhhhh
.
Wearing dark clothing to avoid the end of the world. That is so you. I'm out on the piss on the 21st as it is Mad Friday. Here's to the end of the world.
ReplyDeleteWell if is the End of the World it will certainly be mad....
DeleteI don't think I can cope with the world ending again. It was supposed to have ended a bit ago and it didn't. I got all giddy and confessed my sins. I didn't bother going shopping 'cos the cheese would go uneaten after the worlds end and it would have been a waste of good cheese.
ReplyDeleteThis time I'm prepared though. I've opted for tinned goods, just in case it doesn't end and I get a bit hungry.
Here's hoping the flu avails itself to somebody else - because after all, this is the time of year when it is better to give rather than receive.
Yes I know Mr H we have had a few ending in the last couple of years. I really do not want it to end while I have Man Flu and I am trying to be good and not give it to others in the true spirit of Christmas. But if those aliens turn up trying to cause trouble I am going to give it to them; I have see the films and know that the common cold (sorry Man Flu) is their downfall....
DeleteOne small tip Mr H never confess any sins, it worked for that strange bloke with the hair on Top of the pops.
I was praying for a good reason not to go Christmas shopping but the end of the world via aliens, is a little bit excessive.
ReplyDeleteAnd remember, caring is sharing, so passing the man flu onto the ETs, could be viewed as a charitable act.
I am being very good at present and not doing any work or thinking or anything in order to avoid the general public. So that they do not get Man Flu, OK the men do not get Man Flu.
DeleteAs for Christmas it is getting more difficult by the year, whatever happened to all those quirky little presents that would turn up to amuse us. Even the smellies in the likes of Boots are boring now, they used to make an effort to make then look nice once. And I haven't even seem one decent Santa hat for sale by a dodgy bloke hoovering about by the shopping centre entrance.
Maybe the aliens will bring some gifts to amuse the masses like death rays and jigsaws.
Rob, you hold the key to repelling the alien hordes in your diseased nasal cavities. It'll be like War Of The Worlds.
ReplyDeleteOooooo I do hope so, that will liven up a few blogs, Twitter and Facebook.
Delete\,,,
ReplyDelete({}{}-
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I tried to draw you something that looked like a bug. Hope it makes you feel better. I have no idea how it is going to help, but if it does, please eXplain it to me.
Oh, the bug was supposed to be seen from a bird's eye view (looking down) but I drew it in a different font than is displayed, so the legs on the left side (bottom) are scrunched together more than the ones on the right side (top).
DeleteYour bug is excellent it reminds me of a Hummingbird Hawk-moth. One of the great beauties of nature.
DeleteIt also means that all five members of RAT's have made a comment on this post, although I am one of those five.....
We have a large insect in our part of the world that acts like a hummingbird. But I do not know its name. We had a bush in front of our house that had dark pink trumpet shaped flowers that attracted the hovering big bugs but my wife had someone destroy the plants. I thought that was sad, I wasn't included in that decision. I should try to find some seeds from someone else's plant and get it to come back in that flower bed.
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