Sunday, 9 April 2017

H means its time for Harpies, Hercules and Hungarians

OK . . . thats better its one of those fairy tails from back in 2013 because I am still busy  as it happens I am off getting wood screws and the like to continue building my rather interesting summerhouse with towers and stuff. Yes it is far too complex and it taking ages too build, but that is the sort of chap I am, I am not going to do stuff the easy way OOOooooo No.

Harpies, Hercules and Hungarians 

We have all HEARD of the HARPIES, the daughters of Thaumas and Electra who would be very naughty and HAD a HABIT of stealing all the food of Phineus, the king of Thrace, things like HALIBUT, HERRING, HOTDOGS, HAGGIS, and HAM sandwiches, but few have HEARD of HENRIETTA the HAPPY HARPIE. HORRIFIED by the HORRENDOUS HABITS of her sisters (the three other HARPIES). HENRIETTA the HARPIE HID in the HILLS and HELPED HUMBLE HOBBITS to tie their HOBNAIL boots up and HELP HEDGEHOGS to cross the road, and HOOVER and trim HEDGES. Then one day her sisters said they were HAVING a HOLIDAY and would visit HENRIETTA at her HOME in the HILLS . . . . . .HELP thought HENRIETTA who knew the HOBBITS and HEDGEHOGS were HARDLY going to be HAPPY so she HATCHED a plan. She invited HERCULES, HOMER and HORUS to her HOUSE.

When the HARBINGERS of HORROR and HAZARDOUS HAZARDS arrived at the HOME of HENRIETTA the HAPPY HARPIE to HARASS HER she introduced HOMER who said he would read HISTORY for HOURS and HOURS to the three HARPIES to HELP. Then HORUS HOWLED from the HUT on the HILLSIDE, the three HARPIES do not like HORUS because HE’S HALF a HAWK and HALF an Egyptian HIEROGLYPHIC and HE HOWLS better than they do.  Then HERCULES (famous for his fight with the HYDRA) wearing a HANDMADE HAT and HOOLA skirt offered them HOT chocolate and HOBNOBS, apparently HARPIES HATE HOBNOBS.

To make matters worse for the three  HORRIBLE HARPIES, a HERD of HYENA and a  HUGE HUSKY started to laugh HYSTERICALLY at them, so the three HORRID HARPIES said our HEADS HURT we HAVE HAD enough of this HULLABALLOO we are HEADING HOME to HAMPSTEAD HEATH.

As they flew HOME they were tempted to HARASS a group of tourists on HOLIDAY at a HOTEL and stole all their HAMBURGERS, but even this did not go as planned as the HOTELS guests were HUNGARIAN tourists who set fire to the three HARPIES. After all, if there is one thing we all know, it is that HUNGARIANS love a big  HOT bowl of HUNGARIAN GHOUL-ASH……… HA HA HA HA HAH HAH AH haha hh haha hah hah hhah ahahah ahah ah h haha haha ha hahaha hahahahahaha hahaha

And the three HORRID HARPIES were never seen again.