Friday, 15 February 2013

The Steam Powered Weather Machine, A Very Very Large Rock and the Russian City of Chelyabinsk

What a lovely sunny day it has been here in the UK, dad is claiming it is all due to his weather machine but I think we can take that with a pinch of salt. AH yes another one of those silly saying. 

As it happens dad has been trying to refine the steam powered weather machine for a while now to create large hail stones and did his first live test last night over the Russian city of Chelyabinsk in order to avoid causing any problems or damage.  Then when dad heard the news this morning about all the bits of meteor, the large bang, broken windows and injured people he said AH . . . . But then you could argue that meteors are very similar to hail stone.

Also at breakfast he remembered that he might have accidently set the weather machine settings to the wrong setting last night, it was set to Large Rock Passing VERY VERY Close to Earth, mum had warned  him that his little joke (the equivalent of having eleven on your guitar amp) was all well and good but also very fool hardy and that one day it might come back to haunt him, and he may find himself having to explain to the United Nations that the huge hole in the planet is because he accidently pressed the wrong button.

So (back at the breakfast table) . . . . .  AH DAMN I ACCIDENTALLY PRESSED THE WRONG BUTTON said dad while eating his breakfast this morning I may have pressed the Large Rock Passing VERY VERY Close to Earth button ,  we all shook our heads and Mum said IDIOT.  But then he said later on, that it is probably the Large Rock Passing VERY VERY Close to Earth setting that gave us such a lovely sunny day, it seems that what dad might be saying is that if we want it to be sunny we may have to put up with large rocks travelling very fast and very very close to earth with the possible destruction of the planet. I must admit it is a close call floods or rocks mmmmmmmmmmmmmm, we have had a lot of floods for a long time now in the UK we need a change and a large rock would be novel.

Meanwhile in other news

As a result of DNA testing by the police in the flower shop they have tracked yesterdays incident with the flowers to the school mascot (the goat), you see the goat has form so to speak (that means he has a police record, not that he is a member of one of the classes in the school) so the headmaster has had to pay ten thousand pounds in compensation to the owners of the flower shop. He has warned all the pupils that he will need to save this money from the school budget and so has found a cunning way of doing this. It appears several large supermarkets have Food Mountains of accidentally incorrectly labelled food products that are going cheap, by buying in bulk he has been able to buy all the school dinners for the next twenty five years but has warned pupils that if they don’t like horses they might need to bring sandwiches to school.  So far there has only been one complaint from a parent called Mr Roy Rogers whose son Trigger says kemo sabe . . . . . . .?

Oooooooooooo yes I sharpened a chainsaw today and it is now very very sharp, so sharp it would cut a large fast moving rock in half like a hot knife through butter. . . . . Phew that could prove useful.



  1. Oh is that what that loud bang was? I just presumed it was the Lil man slamming his bedroom door after yet another one of his tantrums. At least asteroid DA14, is poised to not still hit earth. Thank goodness for that, I've just had my windows clean.

    And it was a lovely day today. I actually felt warm enough to remove my coat. But then I was sitting in my front room at the time. :)

    1. If you think about it, the fact Asteroid DA14 is called DA14 is a bit of a worry because what I think we need to know is where are asteroids DA01 to DA13.

      The Lil man will be OK slamming his bedroom door is normal for his age, you could join The Monsters of Mom and paint his door pink and attach a nice blue bow to it and make him a smiley cake.

      Yesterdays sun has vanished today DAMN, I for one have put my coat back on.

  2. I checked the latitude of your place compared to Chelyabinsk and there is about 2.64 degrees difference, so if the rotation of the earth would have been just slightly different - pow in Powys.

    1. I don't think it would have made the news if it had happened in Powys.

      Where I am they would just assume it was a goat being fired by a Steam powered catapult. The good thing is that back in the mid 1960's the Russians would have assumed it was an American missile attack and hit the big red button to retaliate. You could argue it was a close escape because in historical terms 50-60 years is but the blink of an eye for meteors.

      I guess the only slight worry is the old saying that these things happen in threes, I am sure there must be a reason for that old saying.

  3. Sorry for being around, but what with these space rocks appearing all over the place I have had very time to jump online and do important things, like catch up on my blog reading.
    I'm back now and although very tired (running the site on my own at the mo and we're flipping busier than a load of bee's on double pay) I am endeavouring to read all I can before my eyes give up.

    It's quiet worrying these space rocks zipping about. Having only been told about the big one I went outside to have a peek.... i missed it.
    BUT.... I did see the international space station and was quite chuffed and awe-inspired to think that as I stood mouth opened there was a very good chance one of them could have been on the toilet and flushed just as it went overhead.

    I don't know which is more worrying? the thought of an asteroid smashing into the ground somewhere in the world or accidently swallowing frozen astronaut pee while looking like a pillock in the darkness.

    1. No worries Mr H I realize things will always be busy during holidays and the life of the self employed is a case of busy busy busy so enjoy a nice glass of astronaut pee on the rocks (one small sip for man).

      I have also seen the ISS a couple of times and it is cool to think what it is (a man can). Take care say hello to Mrs H and the regulars, I will get dad to turn the weather machine to sunny for them . . . . . .