Sunday, 6 January 2013
The Magic Beans and other tales
A few days ago, I don’t remember exactly when, I did try looking back to see exactly when; but one of the draw backs of possibly writing a bit too much is that when you wish to pin something down you find that you need to read a lot of other stuff too. One thing I am not a great fan of is reading even if it is reading my own diary, thus all the errors and the like; anyway as I was saying a few days ago I discovered some peanuts that had germinated outside by the bird table and thought I would bring them in, put then in a pot and attempt to grow my own peanuts (OK the UK is not the best place to do this). What I have discovered is that the peanuts appear not to be peanuts, they looked like peanuts to me and were in birds peanut food but what is growing in the pot is not peanuts. I am not an expert on what a peanut plant looks like but my mate Mr Google says that what I am growing is in fact Magic Beans . . . . . . . AH DAMN.
I’m sure a lot of you will think Magic Beans Ooooooooo Goody but no I have been (Been – Bean . . .AH HAH HHAH HAH HAHAHH HAH HA HAH HAH HAHH AH hahah) researching magic beans since I discovered this and all I can say they only bring trouble of one sort or another. So now what do I do; I feel I cant let the Magic Beans die, after all they have battled a long battle to get from being germinated as a flower on a bean stalk many hundreds of years ago, though drying out in the hot sun of 1001 Arabian Nights to being exchanged for cows to finally being thrown into a big bag of bird food. So I now have to let them grow up into the sky where I will no doubt get complaints from the gliders that get released over our house in the summer, gliders and giant bean stalks are not very compatible. Then I will have all sort of giants, monsters, huge mutant green fly and various other issues to deal with, when all I was after was a few peanuts and on top of all that I don’t have a clue what type of Magic Bean they are yet. The dog says they are almost genetically modified Magic Beans and will eat humans that fall into the huge flower heads desolving them slowly in some horrible acid found deep within the slippery insides of the flower head.
So there you have it even Miss Issy who came to visit said AH Magic Beans, is that the time I better go but was very kind and gave me some peanut brittle (I can’t grow peanut brittle)