Napoleon Beelzebub says he has never had a snowman turn up in the fiery depths of his cellar, known to some as HELL; so it appears that all snowmen must be good and do good deeds. Personally I find it difficult to see why they would be good, as the great general public bash them about, throw snow balls at them, even rather sadistically stick carrots into their faces and lumps of coal in their eyes. Then add to that the rather idiotic idea of wrapping him (her) up with a warm scarf and a woolly hat (as if a snowman is going to want a woolly scarf and hat). And yet through all this they just stand and take it without a single complaint. The dog says we should not be too sympathetic after all, beneath their jolly smiling exterior lies a cold hearted character, but he has also added (before rolling about in hysterics on the floor) they are rather freeze spirited and the first warm day and whoosh they are gone.
Saturday, 4 February 2012
A rare opportunity to meet the very nice Steven Spielberg in the flesh or maybe his lookalike snowman
In the last two hours in our little hamlet the weather has taken a turn for the worse and it is snowing rather heavily, although it was rather cold and wet even before it started snowing. I think it is just as well that our big family eat out was last night or it may have been a case of making up the numbers with a few snowmen. Snowmen tend to avoid any food involving a roast dinner due to some strange phobia involving the word roast.
I think I might have my first sign of something white emerging from the compost of the mushroom kit and I can only assume it is one of three things; the first of which is a possibility, but I suspect a rather long shot and that is it is a mushroom. The second bearing in mind the present weather conditions is, it is a snowman, and it does seem to be the right colour. Mum has just said IDIOT which leaves me with option three a Strange Alien Mushroom Creature from the Planet Venus. Mum has said IDIOT again but if it is not one of these options then what could it possibly be.
YES this is your opportunity to be part of the interactive manuscript to Book Two a rare chance to help mould (HA HAH HAHHAHH HAH HAH hahah hah ha) the sequel block buster movie and meet and discuss your option with the very nice Steven Spielberg in the flesh or possibly a Steven Spielberg lookalike snowman if all else fails. SO THIS is a ONCE IN A lifetime
opportunity, YOURS for today Only (OK tomorrow and maybe the next day). Get your idea in first and be sure to think big.
Rules and conditions apply and we reserve the right to flog your idea for millions of pounds. Remember there are height restrictions but hats may be worm if it helps. Good Luck.
Warning mum says IDIOTS, you have been warned..