Sunday, 19 February 2012
Fox News .... Professor Abraham van Helsing revels all in The Sun on Sunday. Meanwhile another branch of Shrubs is axed
After another game of paper scissors stone I found myself pruning two rather large shrubs near the top of our garden, close to the drive, OK yes that makes us sound like we live in some sort of yuppy mansion. As you know we don’t, we live in classic 1970’s bungalow with over sized UPVC double glazed windows previously owned by a little old lady for something approaching thirty years. So while I pruned (not the fruit, but with a saw) everyone else was painting a room a dark mulberry colour.
As you all know we do not entirely like the inside of our house white, so dark mulberry is much better. There is a great master plan which mum and dad have although I am not allowed to know master plans because they say I then put them in my diary, but I have explained that is the whole point of a diary.
OK yes the pruning why is it what looks like a small branch when attached to a large shrub turns out to be huge when it is falling towards you from a great height and then takes three people to shift it. Unfortunately there was only me as the dog said it was not a bone and therefore of no interest although he did rattle out some sort of Latin name for the shrub adding Yo Ho Ho Three men in a Shrub.
On the wireless I noticed that Mr Murdoch from News International is saying he plans to have a new Sunday newspaper to replace the News of the World called The Sun on Sunday. Napoleon Beelzebub has just added oooo yes that reminds me I better do some paperwork just in CASE; I am not sure what that means. Now you will be thinking why mention this, but I have a reason. In cyberspace one of my followers (now I sound like some sort of leader ….. I am not) a Mr Van Helsing or Batman to his friends, has told me that I wrongly accused the Fox of chewing off the leg of Elvis (that’s Spy Elvis not the one on the moon) and it was in fact the Squirrels so I think I need to contact Mr Murdoch as I think I have his first major headline for the first edition of the Sun on Sunday.
“Breaking News Fox innocent, Squirrels chewed off the leg of Elvis. Batman revels all.”
Professor Abraham van Helsing says its a dam shame, that News International has had the life blood sucked out of it. Luckily I sold my stake in the company some time ago and bought commodities in particular silver bullets, things are looking Grave.
Apparently Ex News International reporter Mr Vamp is available for hire HAAHAH HAHAH HAH AHHA HHAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HHAH HAhah hah hahaha haha hhah hah ha …………. …… AH ………………. …………………….. ……………………. Mum says IDIOT