Thursday, 16 July 2015

Why Pluto Killed Cyberspace and my Triumphant Return



It appears that all is not well in cyberspace, well when I say not well I mean I have lost the internet. OK if you are reading this then it means the internet has returned and all is well again. However if you are not reading this then it is possible that things are not working as they should.  Just imagine the world of cyberspace without me Rob Z Tobor it would not be the same. . . . If you are all having a party and talking about me behind my back I will not be pleased even if I don’t know about it because someone has nicked my broadband.

So here I am typing away in an optimistic way assuming that everything will be OK soon . . .  OK soonish, as its starting to get dark and all is still dead in the mystical world of cyberspace. It was OK until that satellite starting messing about around Pluto, maybe we humans have upset some sort of icy alien critter and they have decided it must be my fault. . . .  I can imagine some scientist saying. . . .  OOOOOoooo No you need to go and see that Rob Z Tobor he is always annoying aliens all the time. . . .  They say that because I have all these brilliant ideas and they are jealous, the world of science is full of jealousy and intrigue even if scientists insist they are all friends, which they are not.  
 
Anyway that’s it I am off now to phone a man who will probably be in an Indian call centre and who will tell me it must be the phone line in my house because BT equipment never goes wrong ever. And besides I am merely a member of the public and therefore an IDIOT.  Luckily I know that there is a house not far away using a BT hub and they also have had issues so they can’t blame me or an icy alien from the Planet Pluto either.  


It appears from the phone call with a disembodied mechanical voice on the phone that there is a major problem which will be fixed soon. . . . . . When I say soon I mean ages.

10 comments:

  1. My internet connection is like an angry lover. It keeps leaving, cutting me off and refusing to divulge relevant information, before then grudgingly coming back with no explanation whatsoever. I want a divorce.

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    1. Just after I got to post this post and was thinking well that was a rum do and thank god it all over, it crashed again. This is what happens when they try to install super fast broadband into the wilds, conveniently managing to miss our location,

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  2. Ooooh, The Dark Ages. I remember when they started sending messages by signals in high places (towers), semaphore. That was a cool invention.

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    1. I would need a very high tower in order that you would see me Mr ESB and some large flags. But it might work as long as it was not too windy or foggy.

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    2. It was hot today but then hailed lightly with a strong crosswind that it resembled fog or snow blowing across the road just now on the drive back from Amarillo. Strange looking indeed.

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    3. I do love interesting weather as long as we get a bit of sun from time to time.

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  3. I'm having issues with our free Wifi on site. Been in touch with the company that run it and they are having a huge meeting with the techno bods as they don't know what the problem is... I'll mention your name vwhen I speak to them, that might solve the iussue! Hahahaha..(grrrr)

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    1. I am not a great fan of Wifi and I like everything connected up using proper wires so I have a small network in the house and it works fine. Well when I say fine it did work fine until BT started updating stuff out in the hills. Leave well alone is what I say playing with routers is like poking a wasps nest with a stick. . . . Something I blogged about not so long a go

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  4. Hope your internet gets better! I think the alien theory is a pretty good one; everyone knows they have the ultimate power over the internet.

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    1. Indeed Miss Laura . . . Glad to see you are back Blogging on a regular basis. . .

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