As many of you will know
(I say many I mean almost no one), I have been making up Harry Potter Halloween
Poetry as a bit of a jolly before I post my Harry Potter Halloween Spooky story
at the end of the month. We are old
mates from way back from the days when Harry was knee high to a grasshopper,
he has never let me play with his wand since (if anyone sniggers or thinks rude
thoughts then I suggest you go and stand in the corner). But of course he was
allowed to head off into Hogwarts to become a wizard and become the hero to a
whole generation through books films and various other media and the like.
Where as I vanished into a small dark corner in the huge voids of cyberspace
living on cake and hot chocolate and waving pointy sticks at Zombies and Seagulls, you see I am not a wizard.
So I have written several
poems now about my old mate on my blog and it has had a rather interesting and
profound effect, one I was not expecting. Now people think I write all sorts of
mad stuff in a random fashion, but all is not what is seems, you see I use guile
and cunning in an attempt to help each post stand some chance of being found by
folk searching Google. Lets face it if I am heading towards the one million
words mark it would be nice if it was read by as many as possible, although the
small hardy group here do keep me going, and when that nice Mr Spielberg makes
the film they will all get a mention and sneaky parts in the film like what’s
his name did. . . Alfred
Hitchcock.
Anyway back to the point,
since I started my Harry Potter based theme it appears that pageviews on my
blog have plummeted like a large rook (sorry rock). Yes rooks do sometimes
plummet but not as well as rocks. SO why
has this happened. Have I lost my touch, are my witty words now just boring,
has my typing finally completely fallen apart, am I a grumpy bloke lost in the
dark of cyberspace and nobody cares. . . . Well clearly NO. This means it must
be a Potter based effect and he is much less popular that I anticipated in fact
he is now less popular than my first theory about the rise of the World Social
Economic Structures and their connection with the insect colonies of the world.
This means that Harry
Potter must be very unpopular indeed. . . It’s a shock for me but when I phone
him up later in his posh house dragging him away from his ice cool drink by his
swimming pool he is going to be gutted. I can imagine he will be in contact
with that Sue Townsend (sorry JK Rowling) sharpish suggesting a new book and
film where he returns to Hogwarts in order to restore faith after the incident
with the cat and the large jug (AH DAMN that’s a spoiler from my Halloween
story). . . . . .
Anyway as I have said it
is a terrible shock that poor all Harry Potter is so unpopular and I feel it
would be bad of me to linger on this point . . . . the one about Harry Potter
being less popular than World Economics so I will go and think about a poem on
a far more popular subject such as maybe a cat and an owl in a pea green
sailing vessel with a plentiful supply of money and honey. . . . . . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
AH DAMN
Can I...titter...giggle...Can I come out of the corner now, or do I have...tee hee, "wand"...have to stop giggling?
ReplyDeleteI hadn't read nor watched the Pottster, but I am of the zeitgeist so of course I know of the legend. So the unpopularity is surprising. Maybe you've hit on the simple fact that the blogger audience does not cross with the Harry audience.
Hello PVP how are things going with the new blog, well I hope. My advice is start from a point of neutrality something that allows for a safe retreat to blog about the everyday events of life like . . . . I had a cheese sandwich for lunch today in the park and saw a goat up a tree. . . . . . You see I worry that your rebellious streak will take you on a route of rebellion and you will charge off waving a pointy stick from the first post. As an old and battered rebel all I can say is such things can look great. But as you charge at the twenty foot concrete wall in full battle cry mode you will suddenly find you are lying on the ground battered and the wall is entirely unscratched.
DeleteSo take care with the new blog and ensure you have a cheese sandwich option available
I could teLL immediately that your picture was a younger Winston Churchill with hair. It just may not be the same WinChu you are thinking that I am thinking about. I think our store is seLLing a few more than normal wreaths for doors with an autumn theme. I am not sure how many are Halloweenish or any Hairy Potter-like.
ReplyDeletePerhaps your popularity is just having a minor hiccup. Maybe people just need to be beaten into submission. One of my favorite office wall plaques said, "The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves". I suspect it may be Lily Jo's fault because it certainly is not me. Perhaps we must settle this issue with a virtual arm wrestling match someday.
DeleteThe picture did not entirely work out as planned, but it was done in a rush and as I have said previously those ballpoint pens are unforgiving beasts.
DeleteIt seems a bit early for door wreaths but they probably last better over there, I think the wet would rot them all in Britain in no time.
I dont worry too much about popularity, I am slowly working towards a sort of goal and I enjoy creating the blog so as long as one person turns up thats fine.
I think Miss Lily and yourself help my blog a lot as you both leave interesting comments and to me the comments become very much part of the post for other new visitors as they weave a web of intrigue and diversity. I have always had a grand group of regular followers who comment and thats WELL COOL. But I look forward to watching the virtual arm wrestling.
I tried weaving intrigue and diversity and got
DeleteDitrigunometry, which must be the mathematics of dual triangles. It could also be the measurement of just two sides of triangles ignoring the third for people with Task With Incompletion Neglect Syndrome, or TWINS.
Ditrigunometry is a good word. Dueling Triangles is from that film I'm sure
DeleteWas it 'Dueling Bangles' ?
Deleteor Bueling Dangles
DeleteI had to go stand in the corner too. Can I come out now?
ReplyDeleteI didn't know you were mates with Harry Potter, I would have thought he would have told me that...
Somehow both your and Miss Lily's comments got missed but I put this down to you both being in the corner of the room with almost everyone else. . . . I think Harry likes to keep any knowledge of me quiet, he says it bad for his street cred.
DeleteDamn Mr Z, what with playing with wands and waving your pointy stick about, I ain't never coming out of this corner!
ReplyDeleteI blame that Harry Potter I know he's a wizard but he will get his wand out and wave it about at the slightest provocation. Apparently its eleven inches long. . . . . . . . OK Miss Lily back in the corner again and count to 100
Delete