At school today as the headmaster did his
morning morale speech in the main hall to cheer everyone up there was a sudden
ring of the door bell at the front entrance, this is not normal, folk usually
wander in and wander about lost. So everyone looked to see who it was, well
everyone except me as I was watching a dragonfly pottering about near the exit.
Well the next you know was everyone running and screaming out of the hall and
leaping into cupboards or hiding under tables, while most of the staff
barricaded themselves into the staff room, leaving just me and the headmaster.
As the headmaster peered at the two faces looking rather sheepish standing at
the door holding a bible and a Watchtower (the magazine not a real one) he
insisted that I could go and talk to them as I was expendable. It appears as an unpaid part time student
teacher I am surplus to requirements and my specialist subjects of Obscure
Irrational Theories and Zombie Defence Classes are not core curriculum subjects.
He also said that if I specialize in Zombie Defence Classes and had a pointy
stick then I should be able to defend myself.
At the door I chatted to the two chaps who
were dead keen to tell me loads of stuff about the bible, so I explained to
them the major errors of large religions and told them all about the far better
idea of Micro Gods. I was planning to show then Dragonflightimus the Micro God
of Helicopters, but in the stampede Dragonflightimus the Micro God was slightly
crushed to death. You see this is what
happens with religion, small things can get crushed in all the misunderstanding.
So poor old Dragonflightimus the Micro God has flown her last fight but will
luckily rise from the ashes next year to fly again, we are talking Micro Gods
they do stuff like that, which apparently is what the two chaps with their
bible and Watchtower say they plan to do also. . . . . .
Anyway tonight my drumming
colleague and myself have had a well good drumming session to celebrate the
local Micro Gods of Autumn, we then gave him pond plants apples and vegetables
in order that he can go and offer them to his Micro Gods in the Castle of the
Bishop. That’s my drumming colleague not the local Micro Gods.
Ooooo I forget to say Mr
Darren tinkered with our old range in order to make the central heating work
before he rushed off after seeing two strange men on the road with an old bible
who were looking into the sky for dragonflies.
Luckily I have this LP and this is one of my favourite songs....
Yay the micro gods are back! Pity one had to die for our sins almost straight away, but that's religion for you. Well, that and heavy shoes.
ReplyDeleteThere are many heavy shoes in religion sadly.....
Delete