Saturday, 28 September 2013

Diaries and Jannugras the Micro God of Autumnal Events.

I have spent much of the day pottering about doing little jobs here and there, but nothing interesting or of any great devastating news. This happens from time to time or should I say quite a lot and is probably one of the main reasons why folk are not generally great at writing diaries. But I am a persistent chap which is why the very nice Mr Steven Spielberg took out the injunction to keep me away, all that talk of I have the wrong man and wearing a huge false nose and pretending to be a greengrocer in Potters Bar, he cant fool me with his cunning ways.

Now as I was saying it is not easy to write a daily diary if you are an ordinary sort of chap like myself, after all we are seldom attacked by Zombies, Mr Jones has not seen a Alien space craft in weeks, the creatures of the woods are preparing for winter and howling a bit. The pheasants are still oblivious of the fact folk will come and shot at them, despite me telling them and trying to stop them running up to humans, smiling and asking for some grain….. They are stupid birds that’s for sure.  Dad has dismantled the weather machine looking for a fault and the dog is still in the Vatican teaching maths and Latin to seabirds.

So what did I do today, well I made a special pointy stick designed to help remove apples from a rather large and very old (a really old as in seriously old) apple tree. It is a big apple tree so a special pointy stick sort of helps. OOOooooo yes a word of advice do not stand under the branch you are shaking with the pointy stick while you are actually shaking it. I bet that Isaac Newt-Man would have changed his ideas a bit if he was attacked by a large swarm of apples hell bent on causing harm to his head…

And as well as apples falling, so are the leaves so our effigy of Jannugras the Micro God of Autumnal events is in position and ready for his offerings, in fact we are off tomorrow to the big village feast to celebrate the arrival of Autumnal events and the Autumn Micro Gods…

Ooooo I heard a man shouting today, he may have thought a large chicken was a Zombie, it is easily done in the Autumn evening light. I have noticed Zombies do walk a bit like chickens.    


  1. I'm constantly walking around thinking chickens are zombies, so I feel his pain. I don't know what it is about them, I think it's the eyes...

    1. You are right about the eyes. I wonder if Kentucky Fried Zombie would sell well..

  2. Perhaps the chicken was a zombie that had been tarred and feathered.