Thursday, 27 November 2014
Steven Spielberg, Jurassic World and certain investment concerns about dinosaurs
As my few but loyal followers will know I have been cooking up brilliant ideas for the very nice Steven Spielberg now for about four years and in that time have thought of hundreds of them. Some of them probably even good ones, yes the law of averages states that I Rob Z Tobor is capable of thinking of good ideas, a bit like all those monkeys writing Shakespeare in the infinite voids of infinity. So am I annoyed that the nice Mr Spielberg is doing a sneaky and churning out yet another dinosaur film, this time called Jurassic World well the answer is . . . . . . . . a bit.
And in order to understand just how improbable this film is it is important to go back to the beginning when some bright spark comes up with the idea of Jurassic World in the first place. So let us reflect on a man as he walks with purpose along the busy streets of
clutching his neat
leather executive case heading towards the Gotham City Central Bank. Gotham
Hey hello Professor shouts a voice in the crowd as Professor Frankenstein busily pushes his way through the throng into the huge marble hall way of the Central Bank, its magnificent classical columns twinkling with the light of the halls chandeliers.
Clark I am a bit late for an appointment
at present so will see you later, I could have a great story for the paper. With that he
waves and heads off towards the manager’s office, it is not good to be late
when you want to borrow several million Dollars.
Professor Frankenstein you are on the dot please come straight in it is always good to see you. Says the banks Manager
Ah Thank you . . . you are very kind
Please take a seat and tell me how I can help you, although I have to warn you banking has changed in the last few years it is not like it was back in the good old days.
Yes I have a new plan. One greater than any of my previous plans and one that will make us all very very rich it’s a brilliant plan if I say so myself. But I will need to borrow several million dollars.
Well as I have said Banking is not what it was, but we are always keen to support good ideas tell me all about it.
Yes I want to build a world full of living dinosaurs and breed them in captivity it will attract millions of visitors and scientists from all over the world. . . . I thought I would call it Jurassic World.
AH . . . . Well Professor it sounds a bit like Jurassic Park to me and we know what happened with that and more than once I may add.
Yes OK it didn’t entirely work out as planned but this time it will be dead exciting . . . no pun intended. . . and entirely safe. . . . . Sort of.
You said that last time Professor and you told me that they would be small dinosaurs not huge things
Well they were smallish . . . . they just had big claws
Indeed and just how big will these dinosaurs be this time.
Welll mmmmmm maybe 70 to 90 feet long or so but with smaller claws.
Look I’m sorry Professor but the bank can’t afford to invest in more monsters we are not thought of well at present and your track record is a bit dodgy to say the least. I mean what happened to that chap you made with the bolt through his neck. And we invested in that King Kong which turned out to be a bad move, as did that bloke
Jones and his Pyramid Scam. And if anyone mentions the creature from the black
lagoon again I will hit them. Indiana
So it sounds like you are saying No
O what the hell we will give it a go what can really go wrong. . . . Sooner or later someone will get the hang of these dinosaurs, they cant all be super intelligent killing machines. I mean just how realistic is that, After all even that nice Steven Spielberg would not be foolish enough to make yet another of those films would he.
AH DAMN funny you should say that
THE END. . . . . . . . . . .