Poetry for School Career Advisers

I thought I would become an Escapologist 

And escape after being tied up in a sack

But folk got bored and wandered off

Because at escaping I did not have the knack

So then I thought I could be a fireman

And fight furious fires and be all brave

But I got sacked at my first fire

 For toasting marshmallows

On the flames with my mate Dave

Then when I went to become an Astronaut

Knowing it would impress and folk would all say Gosh

But instead they laughed and pointed at me

When my knitted spacesuit

Shrank in the Wash

And although I could have been a lion tamer

And everyone said at taming lions I was really great

I have been banned from keeping lions

When it was discovered

I had lion burgers on my dinner plate. . . . YUM

Then I thought I might write a bestselling book

About miniature vampire wizard robots,

Living at the bottom of a dark deep well

But everyone said it was a foolish plan

And my book would never sell

So now I am a poet and write a cunning rhyme

About miniature vampire wizard robots

Lion tamers, Astronauts, Escapologists

And firemen and bestselling author’s as well

And although I’m slightly rubbish

I might get better with the passing of time

Maybe