The delemma of the Master Criminal

Maharajah Raj Ranbir Singh lives quietly in his house in Knightsbridge, it is not a small house in fact it is a huge house bought by his family just after the war for a modest sum. Its Victorian Gothic façade restored many years ago, its garden sprawling over two to three acres is almost entirely unknown to the majority of Londoners. And despite efforts by many to entice the Maharajah to sell some of the land for huge sums of money he has always rejected all approaches as he has a temple in the grounds that he allows Sikhs to visit on a regular basis.  And of course the garden has many secrets that the Maharajah is happy to keep secret.

You see although a quiet and humble man of peace the Maharajah has his own dark secret unknown to the world. He is what would be termed a master criminal these days, but he is not the sort of master criminal that most people would think of. He would never use violence or destroy or break things to achieve his ends because he is after all a Sikh Maharajah and it is important to comply with the principles of his beliefs.

He has conducted many spectacular and cunning crimes around the world that have left the authorities both perplexed and puzzled with no clues where to start their investigation. Crimes such as the Ghost Train Incident of 1973 where an entire London underground train vanished from the Circle Line never to be seen again.   There was the theft of several Crowns from the Tower of London, a crime that has still not been admitted too by the British government. And then of course there was the very odd case of the theft of over one thousand flamingos from London Zoo and two Elephants.  And at least one very large Swiss bank has lost huge amounts of gold as well as a number of paintings and bronzes by some of the greatest artists of history.

Of course as Maharajah Raj Ranbir Singh gets older he has pondered many times the dilemma of committing the perfect crimes knowing that he was never suspected. And this is the great paradox of being the perfect master criminal; no one knows you are a master Criminal.  Some folk may have suspected over time but it was always a passing thought.  After all the lake surrounding the sheikh temple has a huge flock of flamingos on it as well as two Indian Elephants. And the Marinara’s garden pavilion is a converted London Tube train full of jewels and many exotic things.

So how do I know this you ask, well I was having a long philosophical discussion with the Maharajah admiring this rather good copy of the Mona Lisa, (which looks just like the real thing to me) about how we perceive our fellow man based on the fact we only know a small amount of what each of us think and do.  And the Maharajah was explaining the dilemma of achieving these things but being unable to tell anyone.

Of course I have explained to Maharajah Raj Ranbir Singh that his secret is safe with me and no one will ever know. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .AH DAMN

At least I did not mention the eight lost Fabergé Eggs and the Amber Room . . . .PHEW.

Here where has my watch gone. . . . .