This is a story of three Fantastic
Beasts and where to find them, but it is also a very familiar tale from the world of
fairy tales about making the correct choice when you are considering a self
build home.
Once upon a time there
were three Dragons, an English Dragon, a Scottish Dragon and a Welsh Dragon. Each of the three dragons made themselves a
home from the materials around them. The first dragon (the English Dragon) made
a rather nice house in the Home Counties out of straw bails with a nice
thatched roof and everyone said how very
eco.
The second dragon (The
Scottish Dragon) made his house out of logs from the pine forests of Scotland
with wooden shingle tiles which was a rather grand affair to look at and everyone
said OOOOOoooooo we do like a nice log
cabin in the forest.
The third and smallest
dragon (the Welsh Dragon) was called Blodwyn and lived in a cave near Llantisilly for reasons only known to a small
group of railway enthusiasts. Folk would look in the cave and go AH it’s a cave made of rock . . . Its mmmm
very nice and cave like. . .
Well all was fine
until one day the Big Bad Knight decided that he would go hunting for Dragons.
The Big Bad Knight was called George and he set off from his castle in London to hunt for these Fantastic Beasts,
but there were not many dragons left to hunt as folk tended to persecute them
just because they breathed fire at folk.
. . . A bit.
Well the first dragon he
came too was the English Dragon he shouted at the dragon you better come out or I’ll huff and puff and knock your house down.
The English Dragon peered out of his window and saw George the Knight and
laughed at him. Well when dragons laugh they tend to breath fire all over the
place and before you could say OOooooo
what big eyes you’ve got (George the Knight had very big eyes) The straw
house had burnt to the ground. The English Dragon thought DAMN and headed off
to Scotland
to see his mate the Scottish Dragon.
A few days after the
English Dragon had arrived at the home of the Scottish Dragon there was a loud
knocking at the door, it was George the Big Bad Knight who shouted at the
dragons you better come out or I’ll huff
and puff and knock your house down. The two dragons looked at each other
and burst into laughter and before you could say Oooooooo what big CHAIN-MAIL you have grandma MA the house had
burnt to the ground. The English and
Scottish Dragons thought DAMN and headed off to Llantisilly in Wales to see
Blodwyn the Welsh Dragon.
Well it was a bit of a
shock having to live in a cave for the English and Scottish dragons, but before
they could suggest building a nice house a voice could be heard outside the
entrance to the cave. you better come
out or I’ll huff and puff and knock your house down. Ah DAMN it’s a cave. . . .
. . ok then i am coming in to get you. . . Well George the Big Bad Knight marched into
the cave holding his sword aloft, where he thought to himself damn its very
dark in here so he shouted out to his man servant Has anyone got a light . . . . Well that was a silly thing to say within
hearing distance of three dragons because before you could say . . . Ooooo what big ears you’ve got (George
the Knight had very big ears), the cave was full of flames and hotter that the
tandoori oven in the local Llantisilly Indian Restaurant.
Well George ran off back
to London where
he told everyone he had killed all the dragons and everyone cheered, and
sniggered about the size of his ears. The Three dragons live happily in Llantisilly
(in a cave) watching the trains on the Merioneth and Llantisilly railway. Folk
in Wales
like dragons so no one chases them. And everyone lived happily ever after.
OOOOOoooo yes every now
and again the Scottish dragon likes to go for a swim back in Scotland for old
time’s sake in Loch Ness, but Blodwyn and the English dragon are not keen on
water so stay in Wales.
THE END
When will it end, this senseless persecution of dragons?! What have they ever done to folk? Ok, so they may have burned down a village or two, decimated crops and livestock and made millions homeless. But apart from that, what have they ever done to folk?
ReplyDeleteAnd they knocked down the aqueducts and made a killing in the movies (sorry I mean did some killing in the movies). But I totally agree folk just dont understand. . . . .
DeleteWhen I worked at the hardware store and dragons came in I would recommend asbestos as a material of construction. One dragon with especially bad breath had a funny sense of humor, he had a plaque in his den with the words, "Hall of Toasted".
ReplyDeleteI am not sure which dragon picture is my favorite. Maybe the Scottish one that has frog and alligator features.
DeleteMy own preference was the last (Welsh dragon). I think because it worked out best as a drawing. Using a ball point pen makes the process interesting.
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