Friday, 8 January 2016

More Poetry for Robots

A robot is a grand thing to be
With armour plating
And laser death rays
And X ray vision
So through large thick walls
You can see
And flashing lights
To confuse your FRIENDS
And scary hydraulic claws
With sharp pointy ENDS
And a electronic voice
To reassure the feeble humans
One that you can change by choice
So that if you desire
You can shout exterminate exterminate
Which is always FUN
Leaving humans in a panicked state . . .  as off they RUN 
And a nano nuclear power source
So you can live forever
Without batteries of course
And Antenna bristling on your head
And flashing eyes
That you can turn red
And a special Bacon butty mode
So you can eat bacon butty’s
By the load
And super hearing
So that a mile away
You can hear a tiny cricket
In a field of hay
And a built in teas-made
For your days off
And the ability to climb shear walls
And the ability to decode coded phone calls
And an invisible force field
In order to rule Mankind
Or the ability to transform
Into something Awesome
Like a tiny cute cat
Or even Nigella Law-sum

(Yes OK its Nigella Lawson . . .  but sometimes poetry needs a bit of poetic licence )

Well no one was expecting that.

Nigella Lawson is a robot?