Sunday 29 September 2013

The Ritual Feast of Autumn and the Evolutionary Development of the Pointy Stick.

Today has seen two major events to write about, well when I say major I am not referring to world events because at this point in time I have not heard the news today, so will assume that most world events are continuing as predicted (some good, lots of bad, a few happy and lots of sad)……..

No these events are in world terms Micro Events, another good reason for Micro Gods, they are more attuned to the smaller events of the individual. The first was the evolutionary development of the pointy stick; I have warned of such things in my diary in the past and how it can all end in atomic bombs and angry politicians. But this was an evolutionary development for the greater good of man. I have developed a pointy stick saw, a device for trimming trees and small branches out of the reach of mankind.



I have long thought that there is a market for a lightweight telescopic device that you could attach a wood saw or other such items to, in order to reach places that the human arm can not, but I am not aware of anything suitable. Maybe I should go on that Dragons Den TV show and show them my new pointy stick saw. I was able to use my pointy stick saw to trim a few branches that needed trimming that were hanging beyond the Zombie defence system, there is always the worry that one day Zombies will learn to climb trees or scurry about in ventilation shafts.  What ever happened to that Mr Shaft bloke he was the Mr COOL of his day before that annoying Harry Potter chap turned up.

The second major (Micro) event of the day was the Ritual Feast of Autumn where were all celebrate the success of growing our winter supply of food by having a huge feast and eating it all. . . . . . . . These events take place across Britain about now (well in rural communities anyway) and are one of the reasons for the development of the supermarket, since folk discovered they have eaten their entire supply of winter food in a celebratory feast.  Iron age man worked hard at avoiding this happening year on year by shutting down all the stone circles, but of course by then the convenience of convenience food and the rise of the supermarket had taken hold. Lets face it us humans would much rather pop into a nice store and buy stuff than all the agro of chasing a buffalo across a field with a pointy stick, even the revolutionary pointy stick saw…..

Ooooooo Yes Mr S. and Mrs I. came and helped eat all the food, which was good, and Mr S also helped me to establish North, apparently Northern Zombies are more formidable than those down South.  We now plan to chill and do the Sunday things of modern life, although it’s too late to go to IKEA.


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11 comments:

  1. A pointy stick saw, now that is a good idea. I would certainly buy one.

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    1. it seemed like a good idea to me and the improvised one did exactly what is was meant too. so a telescopic lightweight one would be a winner.....

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  2. We have robot arms for picking things up. They have a trigger for activating the gripper claw with suction cups. We use them mainly for picking up dirty laundry.

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    1. We have them over here too, you often see folk on the side of roads using them to pick up litter. Both touching litter and bending down are health and safety issues these days. But a long telescopic device means the world is your ouster as the old saying goes.

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    2. I have recently over the last three months been including oyster sauce in my gumbo and I think some other soups. I makegumbo probably a little more than once a week. Then for Thanksgiving and Christmas my wife always makes me oyster based dressing/stuffing.

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  3. I once chased a buffalo through a supermarket, so I can relate to your post.

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    1. I think that might have been the smaller and far more common in the UK . . . . Buffalo Mozzarella Beast, Mr Addman. Often seen lurking about near the chiller shelves.

      Mr Addman is mad Mr ESB, us Brits are famous for it although we like to call it eccentric.....

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    2. That is good to know, I would fit in just fine. I am about half English by ancestry.

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    3. I'm pretty sure it was a buffalo. It was a large, cow-like beast and it wore a badge that said "Hello My Name Is: BUFFALO"

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    4. If it was cow-like, it could be a Miss or Mrs Buffalo. If it was bull-like, then most likely Mr Buffalo. I had the most delicious soup today from meat of a buffalo steak, mmm, onion based with a bit of dry Zatarian's Gumbo mix stirred in to thicken it up, season with a variety of things, most notably a bay leaf and oyster sauce. Buffalo French Onion Soup

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