Thursday, 18 October 2012
The phobia of putting up shelves . . . Pluteusiphobia
This is a very difficult diary entry to write, very difficult indeed, but not for any reason that might have come into your head, because lets face it when someone writes something like this is a very difficult thing to write people think of all sorts of stuff. But in this case all that, all sorts of stuff is the wrong stuff. You see Heavy Harry the Cat is a bit poorly still and he has settled down on my head. Which means it is far from easy to write anything, this and my known skills with a QWERTY keyboard plus my spelling skills can only result in the days events turning into gibberish. Which is not like me I am usually so concise and to the point, while on the subject of points I have to inform you that Heavy Harry the Cat still has pointy claws despite his present illness. The dog says if I just stopped moving about the cat would not need to cling on; easy to say when you don’t have a cat on your head.
So today was a day of practical subjects at school, as part of the new academy status they now teach pupils how to put up a shelf. Although both boys and girls are taught the subject it has been proved scientifically that each of the sexes approaches this task in very different ways.
Men it appears have a bit of a problem with shelves and there is a new theory that men suffer from Pluteusiphobia the fear of putting up shelves taken from the Latin word Pluteus, meaning shelf like (the dog told me that). I guess it explains why dad never puts up shelves. Women do not suffer from this and are happy to put up shelves but are normally scuppered by men hiding the power tools. This of course is not problem for Esmeralda with her interchangeable clip on power tool attachments and it appears she is a natural at putting up shelves. In fact she totally refitted the school Library and was given three gold stars and 300 house points, she is dead pleased and is now thinking of starting her own business called Shelves-a-go-go with the catchy logo ‘Have drill will travel’. I would offer to help but I think I might be getting Pluteusiphobia.
Anyway I will stop writing now because there is only so much any man can do with a cat sat on his head.