Friday, 29 April 2011

Royal Weddings and the devil you know plus some tumble weed and an eye

It has been and in fact still is royal wedding day. Well with mum being a Goth and dad being a slightly lefty sort of person who is not exactly a royalist but on the other hand says sometimes its better the devil you know. That is a bit confusing because I thought the devil we know was Napoleon Beelzebub not the royal family I didn’t know they were devils too.

I all distracted again now one advantage to a royal wedding is our little town was like a strange lost town with no people in it, me and the dog walked all over the place this morning and all we could hear or see was tumble weed gently blowing through the streets. Listening to the radio was odd too because on the news they would tell us in detail what everyone was up to at the wedding and add and by the way huge storms have destroyed bits of the USA and lots of people are fighting in the Middle East but enough of that because we have just heard a royal has sneezed. Then after the news it was back live to the royals, We all thought they looked quite normal on everyone’s television (it is odd to see the same person on every television in the town) but the man on the radio said they were special and glowed in the dark and could walk on water and through walls and juggle mice, which would be very useful at home just at the moment; but mum said IDIOT. The great street party will be starting soon so Napoleon Beelzebub’s Very Strange Victorian Curiosity Shop has shut early and he has come round to see us. He said he was sending the royal couple a wedding gift of some very very secret MI6 files all to do with some big conspiracy theory from a few years ago which will be a big surprise for them. What a nice man he is not like a devil at all.  His royal shop window was a great success until the arm fell off the Skeleton of the ancient king of Zanzibar and his eye fell out and someone complained and the council made him remove all the body parts even if the were all royal ones from the past.  

By the way it was not Napoleon Beelzebub’s eye that fell out it was the skeleton of the ancient king of Zanzibar’s eye that fell out otherwise the story sounds silly

Paul Nessman                I suppose the MI6 conspiracy theory information is TOP SECRET? Perhaps I will consult my Jules Verne Pocket Oracle and Prophecy Machine.

Well I think it might all be to do with cars in tunnels and who knew what and did what and knew what about the things that might get known if certain people were in the bright lights and able to say things about certain stuff which is best ...not known etc. Mum says its all rubbish and all just a big accident of fate But Nepoleon Beelzebub says he is not a fan of fate and someone who should not have one in fact has a loyalty card with bonus points. And as he points out himself, us humans are not playing the game very well and those who should be going to see him are like greased pigs on a big dipper at present. That sounds very dangerous to me

Paul Nessman                Thank you for the explanation :) I agree with Mum.

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