The Mountain and the Undead

Me and the dog have spent the morning searching for the fabled Mount Gomery but with no luck, then when we got home we have been told it has now been discovered it is a spelling mistake all along. No wonder we could not find it, apparently according to dad and Pirate Pete it should read Count Gomery who used to suck the blood of his victims in the dark of night and lived in a wooden box full of soil in daylight.

 He had to wash his duvet every night because it would get really dirty from all the soil. I think his pillow was just as bad so he was always very grumpy which is why he sucked all the blood out of everyone at night. He is meant to be one of the undead, Pirate Pete said he doesn’t like the undead much because when he went for a part as an extra in the Pirates of the Caribbean film it was the undead who got all the parts in the film and they were not even real pirates. It is why he turned up for the Pirates of the Caribbean school pantomime at Christmas time and is now very much part of the story.    

Anyway me and the dog are now looking for Count Gomery although it is harder than we thought because it is really surprising how many people look like they are the undead. Mum of course being a Goth says it is one of the reasons she likes living in our little town, it is full of very strange people. She said some people even think we are strange GOSH how odd; how could anyone think we are odd. The dog insists that if we are going to look for Count Gomery tomorrow then we need to take stakes with us so first thing in the morning he plans to go to the butcher and get as many as possible.