Saturday, 3 May 2014

C is for the Curious Case of the Computer Update

Late last night myself and Mr Jones dressed up in camouflage armed ourselves with pointy sticks and a selection of large blue blocks that Mr Jones said were his secret weapon and ventured out into the night to defend Earth from the Rat People of Eaglefleebite 7. Mr Jones said if we could catch Big Boris and entice him into eating some of the blue blocks then it was game over.  Of course the best laid plans of mice and men or should I say RATs (as in Radical Abstract Thinkers) and men never go to plan (it is another stupid saying), and the Rat People of Eaglefleebite 7 did not turn up there was not a single light anywhere to be seen. Mr Jones said it was very annoying and also extremely curious indeed.

On the subject of curious things, what did happen last night which most folk would not think about much was my trusty old PC did a Windows Update. OK I can hear you all type, SO WHAT, but this old PC runs Windows XP the now dead operating system which I recently rallied round to support with my We Love XP campaign . . . . Keep Windows XP Undead. . . . 

I had started to think my efforts were scratching uselessly at the Big Gates (affectionately nick named Bill) of the huge Microsoft corporate body, but maybe not. Could it be that a member of the almost unheard of elitist Keep Windows XP Undead Gorilla Movement has gnawed their way through the skirting boards unseen and in the best tradition of Moles now sits at the heart of the Microsoft organisation?  Sticking their head above ground to create another little mound for us to scoop up before vanishing back underground to hide in the labyrinth of dark tunnels (Microsoft really should spend more money on lighting up those corridors.

 Of course if the elitist member of the Keep Windows XP Undead Gorilla Movement sticks his head above ground for too long folk will say things like . . . . . . . . .  What is Brian from Software Development doing eating the skirting boards . . . . . .and . . . . . . O my god have you seen the large deposit he has left on the lawn. You don’t think maybe he has turned into one of those Rat People of Eaglefleebite 7.

Anyway this is long enough now for a daily diary entry so I will go leaving you with the following questions.

Is Brian one of the Rat People of Eaglefleebite 7 rather than a Mole? . . . . . They look similar

Is Windows XP still one of the Undead?  . . . . . . . . (WELL COOL)

Will Big Boris return tonight?

Why did a man called Mr Gates call his operating system Windows, does he have a buildings fetish? 

Why would some mad bloke start working his way through the Alphabet all over again? 


  1. Answers to some of your questions but not in any order:

    Because its there.

    Its begining to look a lot like Christmas, everything aglow. But everything you think you know is maybe just so-so, as into the night we go.

    Because Lose-dows doesn't sound as positive as Win-dows.





  2. I am terribly eXcited that your blog odometer is approaching 100,000 and your number oof readers is 15 more than 100, or as the ancient Egyptian toddlers used to say as they held up all their fingers, toes and thumbs, "more than this many." and they would get several of their friends to join them. They would stack them together with a low row of glyphics and a high row of glyphics.

    1. The Seagulls are fishing in the duck pond on Saturday we will go and eat a cake in the shoe shop.

      PS you will need to read yesterdays response to your comments first Mr ESB for this NOT to make sense.

    2. I habituaLLy rely on things to not make sense.

    3. I am good at that . . .

  3. Maybe you're not a bloke. Maybe you're a mole. Or a Boris.