Saturday, 14 July 2012

A jet wash, a cat, an RSPCA man and the best selling book on farming..... and a blog award

I was jet washing the path at the back of the house as it getting a bit slippery with mould and the like, as it is to the North side of the house. Apparently I was told that it was possible that I personally would be sued if someone fell as it is my responsibility to jet-wash it. This came about after a game of Paper Scissors Stone where as you will have guessed I lost again….. I don’t mind using the jet wash although the bottom two feet of me, not my two feet although the bottom two feet of me includes my two feet, got rather wet. As most of you will not know I only wear Converse trainers and have done so for a long time (it is a long story), they are usually rather battered so I ended up with very wet feet (two feet).

While I was doing the path the dog suggested that I could wash the cats at the same time, they are sulking now and both mum and the RSPCA man have said IDIOT. I did explain it was the dogs idea but when the RSPCA man went to see the dog he just sat there wagged his tail and picked up a piece of wood. When I tried to explain to him that the dog talks Latin and does my maths homework the RSPCA man said IDIOT again to me, and the dog dropped the piece of wood on his foot (one foot). He limped off then muttering (the Man not the dog or piece of wood) and the dog fell about in hysterics and was whispering something in Latin to mum. It appears it is best that the RSPCA don’t know that the dog speaks Latin as it would only cause problems, although it appears to be causing a few for me today.

Someone was telling me today about some best selling book all about crop farming, that is rather annoying, here am I on book two of my life and still no luck with that nice Steven Spielberg yet apparently he says he is waiting to see how it pans out as a series and is waiting for book four, and yet a book on farming I am told is selling like hot cakes. Well I guess cakes tend to be made of wheat so there is a sort of link but it is very annoying indeed.  I was planning to get a copy via the internet but mum said IDIOT again too, I guess she is right I have no interest in farming and a best selling book on farming is not going to change that.

OK that’s it I must away now and go and do other things before it gets dark and try and convince the cats that bold patches are trendy for cats this year……. Ooooo yes before I forget that book is called ‘Fifty Grades of Hay’ ……. No sorry but that sounds very boring? 


I was awarded an award yesterday, and as you know I am not good with awards I have a few lost in the system somewhere. Anyway it was given by someone new to me so I have investigated their blog and it reminded me of Miss Lily. I like Miss Lily’s Blog so that is a good sign.  I think they really wanted to give the award to Miss Lily and not me but well Miss Lily has a shed full of awards so after many attempts to give the award to all the deserving Blogs who also have shed’s full of awards I got it. Apparently a friend of a friend said “Hay that Rob has a cool dog that speaks Latin and stuff like that, and it has rained in the UK since, well forever so give it to him he will never notice” that is not entirely true. They also said (the friend of a friend) “oooooo he will be a grumpy *********** ******* so just keep you head down and ignore anything he says he will whinge like hell”.  Now that is true …. Anyway here is said award  


This Award was awarded by Crazy Mama at (see link below) so have a look 
Many thanks 

There were questions and stuff but it is late so I will not do that now but all my favourite blogs will be found below the posts 


  1. What I did was read posts of followers of my friends and determine who I found worthy. So, sorry, you earned this on your own! And while Lily and I have much in common personally, but wouldn't say our blogs are at all similar. Wonder what she'd think of that.

    1. Well thank you very much again for the award, I am just a mad cynical child lost in cyberspace.... And it appears Miss Lily agrees with you about your blogs ......... DAMN

  2. I think it was Aretha Franklin who first mentioned that RSPCA men get no RESPECT, or maybe that was an eyeglass commercial for re-spectacles. (?)

    I just got an Apple TV device so your video "Bark" was one of the first things I have played on it from my iPad. My wife wants my old iPad. And she asked me to get a new one for myself. Interesting deal! I have been tracking its journey from China by FedEx.

    1. I am honoured to be one of the first to frequent the inside of your new Apple TV. Have you considered getting another Apple TV then you would have a Pear....... HAH HAHA HH AH AHhah hah hah hah hah hahh hah hah h hhah hah hah

    2. I have been investigating and have found Aretha Franklin, a sheep. a cliff (not Richard) and a man from the RSPCA with a riffle...... PHEW

      I feel I need a rest now after passing my exam.... I just hope I found the right person, animal, place and man with a gun

    3. I was try ing to fig ure out how two ap ples e quals one pear. Pear, ... Pe ar ... I know that PE stands for Physical Education, and Ar is argon. Oh, okay, now it makes perfect sense.

    4. I think you have now confused all the other readers Mr ESB so I will tell them to read your rather good blog ...

      The link being towards the bottom of this blog 'My Worlds My Words My Worries'

    5. So ... The algebra of a pair of pears = 4 Apples?

      Do you have proof I am confusing them? ... I was hoping to merely entertain ... as usual.

      I think I should photograph your pineapple plant on a regular basis, then turn the photos of the leaf growth into a stop action movie. I have made several stop-actions of orchid blooms opening.

  3. Have I mentioned before just how much I love dog?

    I have to agree with Crazy Mama on this one Rob Z, child of cyberspace. I think our blogs are vastly different in style and content, though we share similarities, such as ranting about our Spawns. (plus she's funnier in my humble opinion)

    You definitely received the award on your own merit and because, as I've said before, there is no one else in this blogosphere, quite like you.
    So just suck it up Mr Z! You deserve it! :D

    1. Are you sure that your blogs are not a little bit the same Miss Lily. The dog says maybe you are the same person but secretly being two in some cunning plan to help the Lil man take over the world.

      You will be pleased to learn I have just got the vacuum cleaner out to suck things up. I have never worked out why vacuums need cleaning....

      Hope you are now well Miss Lily from your ordeal of not being well....