Wallpaper, Narnia, Religion, Little Old Ladies and a Naked Man

There are many advantages to living in a small village on the English Welsh borders as well as many disadvantages I suspect, but it suits me rather well. You see I am not one who is keen on whizzing off to the bright lights of the city and when you look at the terrible events that have happened in Paris it is easy to see that the slightly rural lifestyle I have chosen does tend to keep me away from such things. Although plainly no one should have to face such events anywhere.

I have been wallpapering the secret doorway to Narnia today from our living room although I did not get the job entirely finished.  Secret doors are rather useful things to have in houses and given a choice I would have loads of them all over the place which would be great, but as my memory is rather bad I would end up forgetting exactly where they were. And anyway it is a lot of work making secret doors because you are sort of forced into doing it yourself these days, otherwise who ever does all the work will know all the secret doors and that would be silly. 

It is a long time since I put any wallpaper up on a wall (secret doors) and so I was not sure exactly how it would go but it worked out fine and this time I was not told off for accidently losing the canary behind a nice William Morris design with canaries on it. It can be hard to find a canary shouting help when faced with an entire wall of them, hiding in a repeated floral design and a bee hiding under a magnolia flower.

I have just realized this is a rather boring post but this is one of those little advantages of a rural lifestyle out in the sticks. OK we have Zombies and Banshees in the Woods and Mr Jones still hunts for Aliens naked (that is Mr Jones naked, not the Aliens), despite the many warnings from the police.  However we do not have any Religious conflicts because the massed mass of little old ladies make sure that everyone goes to the church fund raising events regardless. Even the local devil worshippers are expected to buy raffle tickets to win the highly prized locally made fruit cake, oddly shaped vegetable or knitted Ocelot in lurid pink. And of course no one actually goes to the church because its jolly cold and full of angry devil worshipping bats.

OOOOoooooo and remember don’t let the bad guys win . . . . . stand as one