Tuesday, 4 August 2015

The art of the double edged compliment and handles

If you are going to put handles on draws and cupboards then it is important to make sure they are exactly in the right place or it will be noticed. There is nothing worse that ripping out the old kitchen knocking down walls, redoing ceiling and rewiring only to have someone say when you finally finish. . . . That must have been a lot of work, is that handle a bit off centre or out of alignment. This you see is the nature of humans. Folk will say things like OOOOoooo that is a lovely shirt is it meant to be white. I have resigned myself to such comments over the years as I potter about with various projects and arty things. A great classic response in art said by many to many is That is really a nice picture. . . What is it? You then go onto explain and be nice to them when what you should say is something like What a lovely nose you have what a shame it appears to be spilling blood all over the carpet, but we don’t do that.

So what I am getting too, is that today I was fitting handles to the new kitchen and I was going to make sure that they were right and they are. Yesterday the electrics were moved about and the sink fell apart. Yes the sink which we planned to reuse as it is only just over two years old fell apart. . .I know sinks don’t normally do stuff like that but this one appears to be rubbish. So a replacement is needed in order to avoid folk saying OOOo what a lovely kitchen Ah why does the sink look like that. . . .that IS  mmmmmm unusual.

Getting the new sink will involve a trip to IKEA (the old sink was not from IKEA) which will involve my car, which went to the garage this morning with a fault, the main man at the garage has gone on holiday so his faithful assistant looked at me and said NO Mr T has gone on holiday, please take it away look at all those cars out there.  Understanding the plight of the faithful assistant I said I’ll leave it over there with the others then. Well what can you do with a faulty car?  I could see he was looking stressed so I cheered him up and said you have done a great job on that old jaguar out front it looks like new, shame about the oil stain all over the drivers seat . . . . I then ran off, well I had no choice as I didn’t have a car, I will sneak back in a couple of days and smile at him and see if I can get my car back.     


  1. What's the bet that you discover more things wrong with your car once it's returned to you, then when you went in? You better make it up to him with a bacon butty.

    1. I trust them Miss Lily they are good mechanics but I bet they would love a bacon butty.

    2. ...did somebody say BACON!!!! hahahahahahaha.

    3. Mr H get back to your Pizza the bacon is MINE ALLL MINE. . . . .