Three and Three Quarter Minutes to Midnight and the Doomsday Book

 Today is the continuing saga of volume three and three quarters, which is the cyber-diary equivalent of one minute to midnight. As it happens I am not sure what the official minutes to midnight state is at present, so I will check . . . . . .

OK it is five minutes to midnight so it appears my diary is closer to becoming doomed that the world is. This is good for almost everyone except possibly me, as I am rather dependent on my diary in order to continue to exist, yes life is all a bit complex as the slightly eccentric child of cyberspace.

Anyway today I went on a long journey to the south, much like the swallows and then I went on long journey back to the point I started, unlike the swallows, but in doing so all is hopefully better than it was before I went on long journeys. The Ghost Writer did a grand selection of IT things today although he did spend much of his time in a state of confusion talking to clever people on a phone (they were not standing on the phone)…..

I hope to start the Official Slightly Eccentric Diary of Rob Z Tobor volume four in the next few days all being well, but time and the arrival of autumn are not helping matters…….    

Oooooo the Daddy Long Legs seem to be reducing in numbers now so that is good, they are remarkably silly beasts.....

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Moving things and 99.9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 of everything

The Slightly Eccentric Diary of Rob Z Tobor (volume three and three quarters) continues for now because of things that are beyond my control, and as it happens almost 99.9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 of everything in the universe that happens is out of my control. Meaning this is in fact the normality for myself; and everyone else.

Yesterday I was unable to write my diary because of the day’s events which involved the tweaking of various things for a wedding party for Mr S and Mrs I.  It was a bit blustery and there is nothing more annoying that having a party and then a large gust of wind running off with your marquee, lights, tables and chairs. Actually the marquee, table and chairs belong to the village, but residents have access to them which is a cool idea in a small village. As for the lights well one thing we do have in abundance is fairy lights.

So yesterday afternoon and early evening we had a very chilled and happy wedding party in the garden where folk smiled and ate food, looked for apples, and pretended they were Michael Jackson disguised as Spiderman. While the Ghost Writer tried to put on inappropriate music for folk to listen too such as the Tiger Lillies singing naughty songs.

Today Mr S, Mrs I and Mr K came to help dismantle everything as the Marquee is off to pastures new in a few days, so we all whizzed about and left the garden such that no one would ever know of yesterday’s events.  And I am quickly writing my diary as we will be off out shortly to move other things for other people . . . . . So as I have said before I WILL RETURN SOON….  

I AM BACK . . . . . . Yes I have returned having moved stuff, it makes me realize that I would be much happier as a hunter gatherer like in the iron-age or before, because back then you got to chase animals with a pointy stick, make a fire, eat the animal and a few berries, paint the odd picture on a cave wall, and then move on to a new spot. Life was simple and did not involve a myriad of complexities involving moving stuff. OK yes I do like stuff, ask those who know me and they will say Oooooooo that Rob has stuff with stuff in it and loads of it, but the key point to my stuff is it does not move about. Ok some of it does which explains why I can’t always find it, but when it is your own stuff it is psychologically lighter and easier to move that doing it for other folk. Back in the pre iron-age I would have just waved mu pointy stick at the other folk grunted and made rude gestures  . . . . . . . . AH hang on I still do that . . . . . . DAMN.

I took pictures of the marquee in the dark last night, but by then all the folk had run off, and a post marquee picture to show that all is as if nothing happened, so that passing swallows heading South will be unaware of how far I have evolved from being a iron-age man…….

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White Rabbits, Harry Potter and the Rainbow

I am still in a bit of a rush, I feel like that white rabbit in Alice in Wonderland; you know the annoying one with his incessant singing of We Are off to See the Wizard, telling everyone he is late and stuff. It is no wonder that the big cheese Wizard Dumbledore turned him into a rabbit in the first place really. Still the White Rabbit is less annoying than that Harry Potter chap who appears to have just given up the ghost these days, I always thought the Cheddar Cat was the really cool one, totally crackers (Cheddar Cat . . . . Crackers . . . . . .HAH HAHAHH HAH hah ah hah ah ha hah ah haha ha ha ha ha hahah ah ha ha hah ah h hah hah ah ah hahh ah hah ah h ha ha ha ha ha.)

So for the moment I will continue The Slightly Eccentric Diary of Rob Z Tobor (volume three and three quarters) because I need time to start volume four which is just not about due to White Rabbit Syndrome (that’s time not about not volume four, which as it happens is not about either).

I did see a rainbow today so that was good in fact it stayed put for about 10 minutes, Oooooo while on the subject of staying put I noticed a big headline on the BBC internet news that stated that Russia and America were no Closer. Now call me a fool if you like, but is that really news after all they are both huge countries and are not going to suddenly move about. And yes we all understand tectonic plates and stuff but unless the end of the world suddenly pops up like a certain White Rabbit then I think we can take it as read that neither America or Russia are going anywhere.

Anyway I must go now as I have chickens to paint, the damned Rabbit escaped…. 

Oooo DAMN I forgot to tell you what I did today ….. O well such is life….

A small Island of no interest . . . . (OK a bit)

DAMN its late again how did that happen, it seems those clocks have been sneakily going round while I did other stuff, such is life I guess. I noticed on the news that the G20 summit are meeting again, but this time in Russia in a room with huge chandeliers (a great place to hide bugging devices).  It appears the Russians are not entirely happy as no one likes them and poor old President Putin just seemed to get stared at by a load of grumpy leaders from other counties who were being very quiet due to the bugging devices hidden in the huge chandeliers. As someone once said President Putin is Putin on a brave face HAH HHAHAHHAHAHH HAH ha ha ha ha ha ha or a scary face. Then to make matters worse a Russian official said Britain was a little island where not much happened and was of little interest. That is a terrible thing to say does he not read my diary, we have Zombies, Monsters, the odd flood, more Zombies, Me, Rabbits, Cows and other things. I mean look at today there was a slight accident on the motorway where no one was hurt badly, although about 150 vehicles got a bit dented, and a very cool looking sky and a weird insect in a tent.

What is the nice Mr Steven Spielberg going to think if the Russians say Britain is uninteresting, he will never read my diary then. Oooo yes what did I do today, I looked in a box then I pointed at things and did things with bits of wire and tape. I am rather clever with stuff like that, much cleverer that say a Russian chap who is not interested in Britain.  

I will start The Slightly Eccentric Diary of Rob Z Tobor (volume four) tomorrow (maybe)…. I HOPE….