The Fish the Crab and the Hot Chocolate

It was very hot today indeed and I have been staggering about a bit like a Zombie, something that happens from time to time when my feet protest about the fact they have to be at the bottom of me while the head gets to be at the top. Feet find themselves in this position most days which is why they tend to be the grumpiest individual body part. Arms sometimes complain a bit at times but they can flap about, which feet cant without making you look like an IDIOT unless you are Fred Astaire . . . . I am not Fred Astaire; in fact I am not Fred Anybody of any sort. Although I may have lost the Thread a bit now as it appears no one is any the wiser about my day (including me) and no one knows what I have done (including me) . . . . . I hate it when you have days where you run about all day and then at the end of the day you cant remember what you did.

Actually that reminds me we went to the vineyard where I drank hot chocolate and ate a rather good slice of chocolate cake, and watched someone doing a wine tasting thing. It appears if you do it (vine tasting) with hot chocolate folk say you are an IDIOT particularly if you attempt your Fred Astaire impression at the same time. My tip of the day would be do not do this.

Anyway while we were away I draw stuff so tonight’s drawing is a Crab and a fish, I did see a couple of fish leaping in the bay, but not Dolphins and I did see a couple of crabs but they were slightly dead. . . .That’s seagulls for you, if you are a small crab all I can say is do not get lured in by the old . . . . .HAY show me your Fred Astaire Impression little crab . . . . .. . . . . it will only lead to misfortune.

Ooooo yes I put some sea glass in a glass bowl so I can now see the sea glass through the glass.

Well that’s it I’m off  . . . . . . I don’t think I have told you about the huge cat yet.     

The large metal post, a man, a one legged blackbird and two supermarkets.

This morning while at Tough Harry’s  Supermarket where we were purchasing stuff such as milk and fruit and veg (yuck) we arrived in the car-park to see an elderly chap in a shiny car pondering along with a couple of members of the staff a large yellow and black stripy post which he had attacked with his car.  It was one of a long line of yellow and black stripped posts that can be seen from a long way off, the particular post (a big metal post) in question was sort of tucked out the way making it hard to hit without going entirely the wrong way.

Interestingly it reminded me of shopping in both the Tesco at Inverness and M&S in Perth. Now folk in Scotland are well friendly, but for reasons I don’t know things have changed in supermarkets from the last time I was in a Scottish supermarket . . . . WOW it’s scary, a true dog eat dog affair like some sort of terrible computer game where only the death of innocent customers stupid enough to get in the way of your trolley will do.  No one smiles and although the staff are a chirpy bunch if you ask them stuff like where is the milk, AND can I get deep fried mars bars in the ready meals, the customers are demonic zombie killer beasts who hate everyone. 

Yet once they enter the street they cheer up and wave at strangers and tell you there were loads of dolphins in the bay last week . . . . . . . honest, and then tell you how to make spicy banana soup (AAAAAAaaaaaaauuuggghhhhh no YUCK YUCK YUCK).

One draw back in being of Scottish blood but having an English accent is that when you see a passing Scottish pirate ship and you wave and shout hello sailor at them they ignore you. Offering them deep fried dolphin on a stick does not help much either, even our tame one legged Blackbird did not impress them much, but he did tend to fall over quite a lot. 

Sunsets in Scotland

As many of you will know because I did say I was going to be away along with the fact I have not been in the grand world of cyberspace in over a week . . . . Thus indicating that I have in fact not been here, but have been away. In fact I have been living in a wooden shed just a few feet from the sea about ten miles from the great metropolis of Inverness.  OK in world terms Inverness is not a great metropolis, but in terms of the North of Scotland it is.  Now many things happened (OK I lie) which I will tell of in the next couple of days assuming not much happens to interrupt the flow, such as the internet playing up seriously badly which it appears to have done since our return yesterday. I was told there was a huge storm locally and much lightning and huge bangs, so maybe that has caused the problems.

While away we obtained a treasure chest saw a pirate ship, fed a one legged Blackbird, found much sea-glass, went Ooooooooo at one of the most stunning sunsets I have ever seen. Did not see the famous dolphins of Inverness. Had a great meal in a place while driving. Went back and had another great meal later in the week. Bought a head from a man. Drew some pictures.  Pointed at snow on the mountains. Saw an oilrig and a jack-up. Went to a cheese shop that only sold Norwegian Cheese and was run by a Norwegian. Saw a huge cat called Ben who was huge. Tied a chair to a post as well as many other things along the way.

Of course how much of this adventure I tell will depend on whether I remember stuff, have time to write it all and the key factor, how much money Steven Spielberg will pay for the film rights to the story.

So that’s it I am off now having told you all very little indeed, but then my diary is a bit like that really in general, full of words which somehow avoid issues like England losing to Italy at football. I have added this because I only recently found out. Although I suspected as much as no one has mentioned it today

No it really looked like this at 11.00pm

A short Break

I am running off to join the circus (MI6) and will be back in a few days.

See you all soon

Have fun in Cyberspace.