The Olympic Sculpture, the Cultural Olympian, the queen and the goat

We have one more day to go at school and then it is half term, it should be this week but due to the queen calibrating, no hang on that’s wrong celebrating her 60 years as the queen everything has been moved. It is a little known fact in the rest of the world that the queen can move time like that in Britain, even the Ghost Writer will get two bank holidays instead of one. The dog is hoping to hear the queen on the wireless making a speech at some point, after a few gin and tonics saying words to the effect “One is ones best loyal slaves sorry servants, minions in all the world one is” ; while the massed crowds mass and cheer and wave flags. Dad feels spending the day waving a flag sounds like hard work so is making a Steam Powered Flag Waving Machine.           

Normal weather has resumed as normal, so we are back in class as normal doing normal things like normal school children. Esmeralda has celebrated by catapulting the school goat into the out of town supermarket  where it promptly started to eat union jack bunting, well she was not to know they have moved the fresh vegetables to a new location in order to expand the expanse of royal memorabilia.  However every cloud has a silver line in, (That is actually entirely not true, although some might who can tell)…….

Sorry distracted Esmeralda, as a result of the goats eating habits is now selling Jubilee Union Jack Goat Poo Compost at five pound a sack. If it goes well she plans to feed the goat, Olympic bunting once the queen stops partying and heads back to buck house for a rest, and the masses return to the grinding wheels of oppression. Have you noticed how I am sounding belligerent and rebellious tonight? It is because I have had to find pictures of royals on the internet in my wondrous world of cyberspace for the ‘Name that royal competition’ in the local village hall. And although I have no real problems with such a task I have come to realize that the royals have more pictures in cyberspace of themselves that I do, surely that can not be right……….one is not amused.

On a more positive point of interest in my what is fast becoming the most boring diary in the world, the Olympic Sculpture ‘The Cultural Olympian’  has finally got his legs back on and is fixed to a base (made of cardboard) so is structurally much  stronger. And I found stone effect spray paint so that is WELL COOL so now he can look stoned…… mum has said IDIOT but I am assured by the dog that Olympians can be partial to the odd drug…….   

     

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