Athletics, Drugs, Winning and Money

Yesterday we learnt the shock news that rather of lot of folk in the world of athletics are cheating by taking drugs; I say shock in an ironic way as quite frankly it is not really much of a shock.  It appears the poor old Russians are taking the worst of the criticism at present and as one would expect are denying everything.  I think we know deep down that it is very likely that all the stuff about Russian athletics is true. But to be fair Russia over the years has been criticised for all sorts of stuff which has made their leaders very paranoid indeed. And the most paranoid of the lot I suspect must be President Putin who is keen to be seen as a strong and important international leader of a super power.  So he will be keen to keep Russia up there doing well at everything from running to bombing folk and many things in between and in some cases some assistance may be required.

In respect to Athletics and sport I don’t really think Russia are entirely to blame for the present situation all they are trying to do it look good and maintain their status as a superpower in all things. The real issue with sport and not just athletics is money, in the old days of Roger Banister it was all about doing your best win or lose and getting a medal or a cup and being part of an event.  Yes Roger Banister did have the advantage that he would turn into The Incredible Hulk if folk annoyed him which did lead to talk of illegal substances. Although he was never tested as he would throw the testers out of the stadium or lift shot putters over his head laughing hysterically, or was that President Putin. . . . Ah No hang on it was Roger Banner and his mate Trigger.

AH yes back to the point money and sport. Just think of the old Olympic ideal the reason it all restarted, a way for all nations to get together as one leaving their differences and politics behind to compete in the name of friendship . . . all that, it’s the taking part not the winning.

Well that is all very well but human beings are not entirely nice and the truth is folk in sport as a whole like to win and win at all costs.  Those of us who are not competitive you see will just never get to the Olympics in the first place or even the final of the school Egg and Spoon race.  Now add a highly paid and lucrative career advertising stuff, and winning starts to get more important and in order to maintain that lucrative career a lot of folk will do what ever it takes to win. Add the logic that some must think which is, if they take drugs then I need to take drugs in order to maintain an even playing field. Once you say that taking drugs is not really cheating it is maintaining the balance.

Sadly there is so much money tied up in sports of all kinds that most if not all of them probably are full of dodgy deals drugs and many other things of which we do not know. Look at FIFA or how the locations of Olympics are chosen and what is spent on stadiums and the like in a gory attempt at one-upmanship between nations.  It is a bit like the Roman Empire in its heyday and look what happened to that.

I once played green bowls in a slightly mad team of people and it was Brill until one year we accidently won a cup and then there was a certain look in the eyes of some team members; it broke the team up and showed me the ugly side of competitive sport in the flesh.

The Fickleness of the Public and Cats and Popular Blogs

Last month my blog had a new record page view count of just over 7,500 and I was a well snig (sorry Smug) little blogger dropping this into conversations with the cats as they demanded their dinner. They pretended not to care until I pointed out if they did not look pleased they would get no food, O yes they soon changed there minds then and meowed loads until I fed them after which they lost interest.

Anyway this month I have had just under 9,500 page views, yet another record for me and I have warned the cats they better look pleased or it is lean times ahead for a few days. I have been trying to work out why this has happened and yet again it comes down to the one thing . . . . . . . Sport.  Yes sadly if I mention sport suddenly I get more page views and of course after the world cup I was forced to comment on the Commonwealth Games a bit. I say a bit because I have not done very well doing this and so far have not spotted a single Alien, just that huge spaceship that no one is mentioning that is perched right in the middle of it all. When I say perched I mean landed or it would be a large alien bird of some sort and I think folk would run away screaming rather than pretend it’s some sort of sports complex or some such other silly idea.

Only I am not sure I have any sporting events left to comment on so I may be forced to make up something that sounds like it might really be happening such as the World Ice Juggling championships or the International Scientists Mathematical Cascade Race.  Personally I prefer Aliens and Zombies and the like but the public seem to have abandoned their love of these fine critters and prefer sport. . . . .  It makes you wonder what the world is coming too, before long we will all be fighting each other or dropping dead from strange tropical diseases. . . .

AH DAMN . . . . Still it will soon be Christmas.  

The Commonwealth Games, the virus and Professor Quatermass

As I have previously said I am not a huge fan of sport, or even a slightly enthusiastic fan of sport, but the terrible thing is that my blog gained a significant increase in page views when I did my in depth diary entries of the football world cup.  Of course much of what I reported was unverifiable and if you ask any of the teams about the use of Androids now they will look at you blankly and say what Androids . . . . . They can’t fool me though.

With that in mind and the Commonwealth Games about to start some time jolly soon (I think) I have decided that I need to look into the rumours of sports folk being taken over by Aliens (as mentioned previously also). Yes it sounds unlikely but there are good reasons why this is not as far fetched as it may seem. Firstly in the last week there have been many stories of a virus in the Athletes village where they are all staying. This virus has been spreading and I believe that a certain Professor Quatermass has been secretly smuggled into Glasgow to stop the Aliens (sorry virus) taking over.

A second and rather important point is that Sports people will willingly let themselves be taken over by aliens as the extra secret powers of the aliens mean they are more likely to win and or at least eat competitors who might be seen as a threat to their medal chances. A bonus in this is they will pass all the drug tests which are designed to check for banned drugs not banned Aliens.

So with all this sport about to put the Commonwealth and Glasgow centre stage I would be a fool not to use it to my own advantage to get the masses to visit to obtain cutting edge news about sport (I mean Aliens) and propel me back into the limelight as a blogging genius (OK I am a bit modest to admit I’m a genius, but its true). . . .

A Perplexing Anomaly about Sport, Aliens and Popularity

I am not a person who has a huge amount of interest in sport, something that may (or may not) be clear from my coverage of the Football World Cup and if you delve back into the deaths (sorry Depths) of my diary, the Olympics.  This is a personal thing, I don't mind if folk get excited by sport, I even have known folk who like sport so much they will have it on the television even when they are not in the room watching it.   But there is an odd thing linked to my coverage of these sporting events in my own rather offbeat way (although every word is true-ish), yes it appears I get far more pageviews on my blog.

So what makes the masses choose my blog to get the latest news of these sporting competitions? Many would say they learn absolutely nothing from my blog; OK they did learn the entire world cup was manipulated by Dave the Elvis Impersonator and won by German Androids. . . . . And the World Cup is probably not the Holy Grail. 

My main worry now is that in order to continue to see growth in the blog I will be forced to comment on more sport, but I am not a great fan of sport so I am more than a little perplexed by this strange state of affairs. Will I be forced to rely on the Commonwealth Games to perpetuate the excitement of the masses? And reveal that certain sports have been taken over by Aliens stealing the bodies of the unsuspecting sports people. . . it is a strong possibility.

Anyway the Ghost Writer spent his day in the office pondering the virtues of computers and using his own set of unique tools to perform tasks that other IT folk think of as plain stupid or blatant vandalism.  And as myself and the Ghost Writer are physically and mentally bonded together in a way that can only be described as diabolically indescribable, much like those Commonwealth Athletes that have been taken over by Aliens.  What this means is, when the Ghost Writer is knackered (so to speak. . . sorry small children your parents will explain) so am I. . . .

Therefore that’s your lot I’m off. . . I hate computers. 

     

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Micro Gods, Tennis, Building a Moroccan Water Feature . . . . . And Newt Spicy Pickle

Today was very hot indeed possibly the hottest day of the year and I think we reached 30C which is something that does not happen that much in the UK, Dad is pleased of course because it means that the Solar Panels on the roof are generating loads of electric and we also have panels for hot water so today we have had more hot water than we know what to do with. Strangely however it was not the best day to work on the construction of a posh Moroccan patio garden, as I was building a raised water feature that will be painted Moroccan blue and may have a rather flash stainless steel cascading waterfall, dropping  down into the present pond. Apparently it can’t be like Niagara Falls because it will make the Newts deaf; Newts are protected in the UK to stop the public making jars of Newt Spicy Pickle which became very popular and almost saw the complete destruction of the little critters in the wild. As it is you can’t buy a jar of Newt Spicy Pickle anywhere now it is as if it never existed much like grass-snake soup and bat fritters all lost to the foibles of modern conservation.

Anyway I have finished all the concrete work now, and it was rather nice to be able to sit out in the evening sun in a half complete Moroccan patio garden having our evening meal and listening to the Castle of the Bishops Samba Band as their drumming drifted across the mile or so towards us on the wind.

Finally I have to say that here in Britain we are reaching the highlight of the tennis season Wimbledon, I am not a fan of tennis but I believe we have a Scotsman in the men’s final tomorrow so all I can say is COME ON TIM. It was the women’s final today which I think was won by a woman. As it happens these things are less sportsman like than you might think because who wins what and when is all in the Hands of Professor Maddos A Hattar the Micro God of Sport and his cat. . . . . . . Anyway my money is on the Grumpy Scotsman in the final tomorrow although I will not watch it; I might go and pickle a few newts……       

Andy Murray looses at Wimbledon... Chicken denies involvement in betting scam

Today was the men’s final of the Wimbledon tennis and there were great expectations of the man from Scotland Andy Murray he won the first set I noticed on the wireless; then I sort of lost interest. I have to admit to not being a fan of such things and was showing a bit of interest because he is the first Brit in a final for seventy odd years, he is also a Scot “Away the lads” and finally the Chicken had said he had found a way in through a hole in the fence and was planning to hide out under the umpires chair and watch.

 Anyway I switched on the radio later expecting to hear of Andy Murray's great win only to hear he was about to loose. Apparently he said afterwards that he was distracted by a bloody chicken on centre court. The chicken says it was not him, but I have seen a photo on the internet which is very suspicious indeed.

We have also pinned down the issue with the main power tripping out in the house, it appears to be linked to the central heating system. Well I say the central heating system because it appears this is where dad has also connected his rain machine hoping that no one would notice he has powered it up yet again. Mum has told dad he is an IDIOT and is torching it with the flame thrower as I speak (type) yet again.  

The chicken is celebrating with raspberries and ice cream after a rather substantial win on who would win the Tennis. The dog says they were fairly confident (him and the chicken) that Andy Murray would loose particularly as he does not like chickens, although the chicken is yet again saying it was not him (her) but a similar looking chicken. I have to admit I can’t tell the difference between chickens so he (her) is probably telling the truth… Mum just said IDIOT again now?