Blue Trees, and keeping stuff you don't need.

It is getting a little late again tonight, I made the mistake of sitting down after a busy day and as I’m sure you all know yourselves it is not easy to leap back into action to get going again. 

I am sure many of you are aware of the fact dad has always insisted that everything should be kept because as he says one day you might just need it,  today proved the point, (yet again) as we have used a long external electrical cable which has been in storage for over thirty years. Dad always said that it was a really useful thing, and to buy it today would cost loads, in fact had we had to buy it we would have not have undertaken the task of getting power to the summerhouse, but it does mean we have a glow in the dark summerhouse and  small tree . . . . WELL COOL.

I sort of mentioned I was planning on making a tree and painting it blue today but I did not complete the task. It appears making trees is slightly more complex that I thought and painting them is a longer process than I thought. Still it has been started and with luck will be completed in a few more days, although I do have other things to do and strange creatures to hunt and loads of important stuff on the go all the time.

I am slowly getting to the point where I plan to stop writing my diary on a daily basis too. This will be rather useful as I have many things to do and days are not really long enough to write everyday let alone try to draw pictures; yes I have not done that for a couple of days now but drawing is only possible when I am not doing other things. It is for example not possible to draw a picture of a huge man eating lizard when a huge man eating lizard is trying to eat you. And if you do manage to complete the drawing there is nothing more annoying than having your rather good drawing of a huge man eating lizard being eaten by a huge man eating lizard and things like this only delay the creation of blue trees.  

The advice of BBC Skygazing Live as told by Mr Jones and Professor Brian Cox . . . NEVER RUB VICK ON THE CHEST OF AN ALIEN

I was jolly tired last night and after a restless night being bounced on by a cat who thought he had caught the world’s largest mouse hiding in a duvet  I was not my usual bouncy self this morning, in fact I would say I was tired, grumpy and rather grumpy yes I was double grumpy. Particularly as I had to leap into action again to fight off mad axe-men with chainsaws, which I was doing rather well until I was hit over the head with an Armadillo toaster and told I was an IDIOT; it appears that the mad axe-men with chainsaws are tree surgeons from Scottish Power . . . . . . . . AH.

I then had to explain to them that I thought they were mad axe-men, trying to turn me into a zombie as part of a horrible master plan orchestrated by militant Penguins annoyed by mans over use of ice cubes in drinks. I think they understood and said IDIOT in a friendly chirpy way indicating that they did not really mean it?

Well it is an easy error to make in my opinion

The mad axe-men (sorry Tree Surgeons) were very cool they had arrived to cut down all the trees growing close to the overhead power lines where I had cut a few trees from until I was told I was an IDIOT, I had underestimated the voltage by about 10,000 volts or so. So now we have this big clearing between us and the woods which is better than it sounds because we can now see into the woods and watch the banshees flying in the evening and werewolf’s sneaking up on Mr Jones who has returned to earth after his encounter on the 21^st Dec last year (The End of the World) with the aliens. He said things happened he did not wish to talk about, but his key bit of advice appears to be never rub Vick on the chest of an Alien even if it does have man flu.

Ok back to the point, the mad axe-men (sorry Tree Surgeons) were not able to remove all of the biggest tree a very large willow tree so they will be back in a couple of days to fell the main trunk. It will grow again no doubt but we can now prune it in the future without the risk of death. It appears if you touch a damp tree that is in contact with a power line it can electrocute you to death or worse, Particularly terrible if it happens over Christmas as you may be mistaken for a novelty illuminated Santa and find yourself stuck to a tree for a couple of weeks until folk notice you are charred at the edges a bit.

Oooooo yes if you live in the UK the very nice man with the smile Professor Brian Cox is on the television in that  BBC Skygazing Live tonight (8.00pm BBC2) which I will be watching, but it does mean that the sky will be full of clouds and they will tell you exactly the same as Mr Jones (although not in the nude) NEVER RUB VICK ON THE CHEST OF AN ALIEN EVEN IF IT DOES HAVE MAN FLU.

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