So at the end of the day, what's it all about then . . . And wallpaper

Last night as I sat chilling watching Stargazing Live on the BBC, I got a phone call asking if it was possible for me to visit a member of my family to hang wallpaper on one wall in order to create a feature. Caught slightly on the hop so to speak I did not have time to make up a cunning and brilliant excuse so in a sort of mad babble I agreed and was told that it was easy and would only take an hour of my time. I mean it’s wallpapering and therefore dead easy. Well that is sort of true except there is a strange black art to really good wallpaper hanging, which I do have, only it has been a while since I did an entire walls worth of it.

On my arrival I did find that one of the reasons that they had asked me was due to a bit of a disaster the evening before when they had attempted to hang the first piece themselves. Then the painter who is doing the rest of the room and putting together some large flat pack wardrobes for them said  . . . . . Oooooooo I don’t do wallpaper hanging far too dodgy and it can take ages.  . . . . I did agree with that, it is indeed a fickle thing to do well.

So three hours later the task was complete and all were pleased looking at the wall and saying well that is a good job done. . . .But how come it took three hours. . . . . Well of course it does take time to line up each drop and ensure nice clean edges top and bottom making sure that the paper is square to the wall so the pattern does not run up the wall at an angle and the like. And I do like to do a job well once I start one.

Anyway that was earlier and I have just watched Stargazing Live again where I discovered I did not discover a pulsar, but two small children did. It can be tough trying to make a small impact in the world. It would be nice to know that every now and again someone would say . . . You know that thing, you Know that thing that Rob Z Tobor did, wrote, discovered, sat on, ate, created, he was a cool chap . . .  I guess I will have to keep working on it for now and write more poetry and make more cardboard stuff and the like.

It is why I have mixed feeling about the sadness and shock that so many express about the likes of Lemmy, David Bowie and sadly today Alan Rickman. It is indeed very sad but in many respects they have been lucky enough to have left their mark on the world when so many live and die and are remembered by so few. It was after all the very sad death of a very talented twenty one year old called Svetlana who never got the chance to truly achieve what she might have  that first made me think I should write a blog. At least I know that in years to come when folk read my blog and I am off in another universe or what ever,  they will stop and think. . . . . Ooooo I just fancy a decent curry now. . . .    

The return of BBC Stargazing Live, a tale of aliens and cloudy skies

A couple of years ago when the BBC Stargazing Live programme with Professor Brian Cox and Dara O Briain was on the television I wrote the following post on my blog. This was before I was a grumpy old bloke and still the Slightly Eccentric Child of Cyberspace, Although I may have also written several slightly mad poems by this stage. . . I cant remember that far back anyway, so who can tell.  I will be watching this as it is a jolly interesting show even if they all seem a bit too happy to me and never turn up ashen faced and telling us about . . .  The End of the World. . . . I mean you could make such a cool spoof BBC Stargazing with aliens and the like. But No No they are all keen and enthusiastic and point at stars and go OOOOo look . . . .AH DAMN its cloudy.

AH I got a bit distracted . . . . As I said I will be watching this so I have cheated and this is an old repeated post. . . I hope you enjoy it, all I can say is I dont know what I was on about, but the universe is complicated particularly when the plucky Brit spills a cup of tea into the ISS main control panel

It is Wednesday today and School has returned to a state of stability, I know this because the Mathematics teacher showed us Newton’s formulas for the stability of nature, In an ideal world this would result in the entire school being all enthusiastic and leaping about particularly as the BBC Stargazing Live is on the television again tonight after what turned out to be jolly cloudy night last night, where no aliens were seen, and no stars or even the moon. But of course The Lagrangian Formalism (The Principle of Least Action) takes this into account and the result was lots of pupils wondering which class they should be in; and why the physics teacher was sweeping up mud in the playground, apparently it was the caretaker in a similar jumper with a pink reindeer on it, it appears the headmaster gave the same jumper to most of the school staff. . . . . . That is all well and good but if they all look the same how can I tell which lesson I’m in.  

So in a nut shell what I am saying is that Newton’s formulas for the stability of nature will state that my three slices of toast fall on the floor at lunchtime butter side down but the Lagrangian Formalism (The Principle of Least Action) states that by adding some curry and peanut butter to hide the fluff they tasted fine and the school cat will lick the floor clean.

I know I should be writing loads more at present but in keeping with The Principle of Least Action we are at the time of year when the least happens, it is a northern hemisphere thing the further north you get in the winter the less things are happening particularly in quiet rural communities where we keep our heads down until spring appears. As it happens there are signs of life poking out of the ground as things like daffodil’s start to grow and the Lemmings of Petrograd start singing the old songs of home. 

Sorry I stopped to watch the BBC Stargazing Live show so am a little later than planned with the post, I was interacting with The Principle of Least Action in way that shows its overall effect rather well.

Hogwarts Academy of Modern Apprenticeship. . . A story of confusion

As we all know the changing face of Wizardry and magic over the years led to some interesting diversity among the various wizard schools throughout the kingdom. Not the least of which was the building of the new Hogwarts Academy of Modern Apprenticeships know to all as Hog-Watts. It got this nickname from its rather successful electronic engineering apprenticeship for wayward wizards who were rather more practically based rather than magic based in their skills.

Of course when the new wing of Hogwarts first opened all was not well, many of the old traditional Professors as well as students were far from happy with what they saw as a step into the world of Muggles.  It was not helped when a very elderly Professor Dumbledore told one of the new Electronics classes, he found the situation shocking. Which only made the class snigger as one of the students connected him to a high voltage cable to make his eyes light up, (not quite the sort of shocking he had in mind).  But times change and the days when a wizard could make a decent living from selling strange potions or fighting the terrible forces of darkness with a dodgy wand made from hazel wood were passing fast.

You see it was now up to the new enlightened professors with their Quantum Mechanics, Particle Physics and superconductors to attract the best students to Hogwarts so the School could charge the Ministry of Magic huge fees to teach the new (modern and progressive) class of wizards. 

Professor Brian Cathode-Cox Pixilation or Sparky as he was known to the students was head of the new facility and through his skills and guidance made Hogwarts what is today.  He is most famed for his development of the light sabre, the Death Star and his very popular r2d2 Quidditch automated adjudicator which he developed after several suspect referee decisions.

there were those however who just could not deal with all the modernisation and new teaching methods at Hogwarts and one in particular a Professor Rubeus Hagrid ran off to join up with a chap called Darth Vader who paid him a rather large sum of money for the detailed plans to several of  Professor Brian Cathode-Cox Pixilation’s inventions. Apparently they both lost the plot completely and had delusions of taking over the entire universe. With their terrible battle cry. . . . High Ho silver and away  . . .

I would tell you more about this, but I find myself sat in a dark cave hiding somewhere in Middle Earth with some sort of Hobbit critter called Dobby who keeps saying he needs to find the ring. I think he has lost the plot also. It appears we have to stay here and lay low for a while because a huge army of copyright lawyers from several well known films are in pursuit saying I am a plagiarist and a bad one at that . . . . . . . As for Dobby he is saying something about . . . ET Home Phone he wants . . .Rob Z Tobor idiot me so Thinks I do. . . 

Ooo o o o o  hang on what’s that

Is it a Bird, is it a Plane. . . . No it appears to be sword stuck in a large stone. Well that’s a bit odd. 

The Red Planet (Mars) DNA Programming and the Great Martian Quest

OK not great pics of the Blood Moon but I was quite pleased 

bearing in mind my dodgy telescope and camera

Have you noticed an interesting trend towards Mars based stuff, even as I type this those clever chaps at NASA are telling the world of the discovery of water still appearing on the surface of Mars in recent times. And it is worth considering that recently there has also been growing talk of trips to Mars. And even the private sector has talked of such things in the future, telling folk to book now for a window seat.

But is there more to all this than meets the eye is it possible that us humans are just part of a cunning plan by Martians. You see long before man was running about and pointing telescopes into space it was said that Mars would have probably had an Earth like atmosphere and environment. If life on the planet developed in the same way as it has on Earth then it is possible that millions of years ago Mars might have had highly intelligent life, long before Earth was even capable of supporting any life as such, even at cellular level

It is also possible that this intelligent life was aware for what ever reason that their own planet was doomed for many millions of years as far as any form of reasonably sized critter was concerned. So what they did was seeded Earth with the DNA of their own species knowing that one day an intelligent creature would eventually evolve that would be programmed to return to Mars and re-inhabit it.  So rather that Man going boldly into space it might be man is genetically programmed to return to Mars because that is our original home. A bit like we all like to go to the sea and watch it for hours, when the reality is its just water splashing about. But its sort of in our DNA we came from the sea, the point is did the critters that evolve in the sea start as a genetic engineering project by Martians.

Look at what happened last night at 3:00 am here in Britain, we were all out looking at the Moon . . .  A Red Moon. Now we are all told it was red because the Earth obscures the sun and the resulting effect is a Red Moon, but maybe not.

Mars is called The Red Planet maybe this Red Glow is some sort of strange beam from the Planet Mars enhancing mans desire to go to Mars, even the background glow of the universe is called The Red Shift.  You see it is all adding up, just how many films have been made about Aliens from Mars, OK sometimes they make films with aliens from other planets but they are few in number in comparison.

  

I think in a few thousand years the remains of Mankind will be looking towards Earth from Mars and laughing hysterically about us, finally knowing we were merely a stepping stone in the great Martian plan to return to their own planet to recolonize it. Mankind will no longer be Mankind by then, they will be 100% Martians and there is nothing we can do to stop it.

Except maybe. . . . . . . . . . No I’m sure you don’t really want to know. 

I bet that Professor Brian Cox is a Martian.              

How fast are we all going. . . . The Big Question

Have you ever wondered about how fast you are moving, well its time to think about this because it is important? Because it does not matter how slowly you try to travel it turns out you are travelling much faster than you ever thought. The average person walks about at about 3 miles an hour going backwards and forwards and eating stuff during pauses, it does not sound impressive. But of course the Earth rotates, so someone at the equator is rotating with the Earth at about a speed of 1000 MPH which is impressive although you need to remember you are only travelling 3 MPH faster than a slug and you might even be travelling slower that a slug if you are walking against the ration, so heading west I think. Of course you could be sneaky and stand on one of the poles (the Earth's poles not a long stick) and then you will just be slowly spinning on the spot.

Well that would be fine except the Earth rotates round the Sun which is why we have years so even sat on the North Pole you are still moving through space while rotating slowly so now we are all moving at 66,500 MPH. I mean that is fast but remember that slug is still sat next to you looking smug (A Smug Slug); all this speed it relative to everything else.

So far it has been easy even the slug is fairly chilled about this, although slightly concerned about how fast he/she is going but it is going to get much faster, you see the Sun is in one of the arms of the Milky way our own galaxy (no not the chocolate) and that is also moving as well as rotating and it appears that the result of all this is we are moving in relationship to the Cosmic Background at a speed of 1.2 million MPH.  Now that is fast, very fast and what it means that ever hour of every day we move 1.2 million miles in the universe so if you go out for the day, say shopping and arrive home 10 hours later your home has moved position in universe by at least 12 million miles. Now that is a long way.

And to make things even worse it might just be that the Cosmic Background Radiation that is used as the reference to tell how fast we are travelling could be part of a moving universe. And bearing in mind each step involves a huge leap in speed then we could be travelling seriously fast indeed within some sort of unknown dimensional thing. I say some sort of unknown dimensional thing because I reckon my guess is as good as that Professor Brian Cox chap, and yes he smiles a lot, but he is a clever bastard and that’s for sure (OOooo sorry about the word I had that Ian Dury song in my head)

What this does mean though is that you are never in the same part of the universe twice and nor is the slug even if you think you are because all the other stuff is moving too. You need to think of the universe like a huge motorway that we are hurtling along as fast as we can in the fastest car you can get, blindfolded and with no brakes. This is fine until say a goat or something similar (maybe an Armadillo) wanders out in front of us (you), when it suddenly all goes wrong and that is the End of Everything. It is also the point when you realise just how fast you are going as bits fly about in random chaos.

 Talking of the end of Everything . . . .  I have mentioned that the 21^st September is the End of the World, and now you know why . . . . . . . Damn those Cosmic Armadillos. 

The art of the double edged compliment and handles

If you are going to put handles on draws and cupboards then it is important to make sure they are exactly in the right place or it will be noticed. There is nothing worse that ripping out the old kitchen knocking down walls, redoing ceiling and rewiring only to have someone say when you finally finish. . . . That must have been a lot of work, is that handle a bit off centre or out of alignment. This you see is the nature of humans. Folk will say things like OOOOoooo that is a lovely shirt is it meant to be white. I have resigned myself to such comments over the years as I potter about with various projects and arty things. A great classic response in art said by many to many is That is really a nice picture. . . What is it? You then go onto explain and be nice to them when what you should say is something like What a lovely nose you have what a shame it appears to be spilling blood all over the carpet, but we don’t do that.

So what I am getting too, is that today I was fitting handles to the new kitchen and I was going to make sure that they were right and they are. Yesterday the electrics were moved about and the sink fell apart. Yes the sink which we planned to reuse as it is only just over two years old fell apart. . .I know sinks don’t normally do stuff like that but this one appears to be rubbish. So a replacement is needed in order to avoid folk saying OOOo what a lovely kitchen Ah why does the sink look like that. . . .that IS  mmmmmm unusual.

Getting the new sink will involve a trip to IKEA (the old sink was not from IKEA) which will involve my car, which went to the garage this morning with a fault, the main man at the garage has gone on holiday so his faithful assistant looked at me and said NO Mr T has gone on holiday, please take it away look at all those cars out there.  Understanding the plight of the faithful assistant I said I’ll leave it over there with the others then. Well what can you do with a faulty car?  I could see he was looking stressed so I cheered him up and said you have done a great job on that old jaguar out front it looks like new, shame about the oil stain all over the drivers seat . . . . I then ran off, well I had no choice as I didn’t have a car, I will sneak back in a couple of days and smile at him and see if I can get my car back.     

The Eclipse, StarGazing Live, Professor Brian Cox and the Sacrifice at the Village Market.

Oooooooo I took this picture of the eclipse I was very pleased with it 

Here in our little village we have a really great market, it sort of arrived here about two years ago by accident when the market stall holders fell out with the owners of the previous location.  So Friday morning is always market day when the villagers go and we all have our ritual of shuffling round the stalls buying exciting stuff and chatting about what has happened over the week.

However today was different, you see this morning the great gods in the sky spoke to us telling us it was time  to appease them (the gods) with a sacrifice of some sort. And while doing this we were to wear silly glasses that meant we could not see a thing resulting in us falling about in a haphazard way. Luckily I did not have any silly glasses only the ones I wear every day to see where I am going, but I did get my trusty three and a half inch reflector telescope out with its special filter that allowed me to watch the Gods as they battled in the sky. And by way of sacrifice I ate Bacon sandwiches and stocked up with cakes for later as I have heard rumour of the super moon. It appears those Gods are very active. This is what happens when folk stop having bacon and piling rocks up into interesting piles or forming rings out of the big ones.

Anyway we survived the wrath of the Dogs (sorry Gods) and I managed to get a couple of cool pictures of the eclipse. Plus I got to eat Bacon Butty’s and I have cake to eat while watching those strange wizards on the TV tonight, Professor Brian Cox and Mr Dara O Briain as they tell us how they have satisfied the Gods for now on the very interesting StarGazing Live TV show.  They smile a lot and never eat cake and I think we all know what that means.

 Its at times like this we need to remember the late great Sir Patrick Moore, I bet he would have been smiling a lot too.

OH did I mention I burnt a hole through my hand today. . . . . DAMN

The Aurora Borealis, Professor Brian Cox and why are humans not that hairy. . .The big Question

I have not pondered any big questions of late and this might explain part of the entire lack of interest in my blog at present, well that and my ability to ramble on about absolutely nothing. So I thought come on Rob Z Tobor time to look at the bigger picture and consider one of those Big Questions one where the answer is far from clear even for a chap like me. You see I was outside last night looking at the sky, on the off chance I might see the Aurora Borealis; did I see a hint of green through the mist and trees I will never know for sure, but stuff like that happens. Was that a three headed dog running along the dark ally at the back of the chip shop with a large lizard in its mouth (mouths), life is full of little glimpses of things out the corner of your eye that make you think . . . . . . Was that really a ???? . . . There is a whole different world in the corner of human eyes.

Anyway while I was out not seeing the Aurora Borealis, wrapped up against the cold with a selection of warm clothes watched by two cats who ran off when they thought they heard a three headed dog, (it was only three of next doors dogs howling at a banshee).  I had this thought why are humans not covered in hair . . . . No I mean proper hair like gorillas or bears (who are not bare) if we are the descendants of the great apes we should be covered in hair but we are not. This is odd because normally where an animal exists both in a hairy species and bald species the bald one spends its entire life in caves and has rubbish eyesight. And if you look at humans as a whole it is amazing how many wear glasses and have rubbish eyesight. Me for one if I take my glasses off I would be unable to tell the difference between a gorilla and say a hedgehog so I have to make sure I am wearing my glasses if I go out in the garden looking for hedgehogs (they taste delicious HAH AHah hahahah ah ah ah ah ha ha hha ha ha ha hahah ha haha haha ha ha ha). Add to this the fact that a lot of the very earliest evidence for man can be found in caves and potholing is still a popular sport made me ponder the very distinct possibility that the human race is in fact rather less a great ape as a rather weird sort of Monkey Mole or maybe a Mole Monkey.

I mean what was the first thing that man started making back in the stone age it was burial mounds or as the very hairy Great Apes would say as they pointed at the large mound. . . . . . . WOW . . . .  ****** look at the size of that mole hill. 

I don’t want to be a mole . . . . . . . DAMN.

Oooooo that reminds me Stargazing Live with Professor Brian Cox is on the TV tonight. . .  

Part One of Hogwarts v Jurassic World.

Due to a very very small increase in cyberspace elsewhere of Harry Potter based followers. I feel I need to write another short alternative tale of Hogwarts for these rather specialized punters. As they say in the docks of Tiger Bay, on the road to Mandalay from Bombay to Santa Fé, o'er the hills and far away . . .  A mans gotta do what a mans gotta do. . . If you are not a fan of Harry Potter, it's OK because the link is a little tenuous. 

All the young wizards at Hogwarts were getting rather excited as it was the day of the Christmas Coach trip to somewhere exciting. Well that is not always as easy at it might first appear because these are wizards and they tend to have a slightly more interesting life than most. What with all that flying about on broomsticks and hunting dragons and the like in the magic forest and the various other activities they get up to with frogs, snakes and owls. 

As they all climbed aboard the coaches the young wizards all muttered and complained and said why can’t we just fly there on magic carpets like last year it was much more fun. But the headmaster Harry Potter explained that Jurassic World was in fact a muggle attraction and they had to behave and abide by the rules of engagement when mingling with the muggle masses.  And anyway Professor Franklin F F Frankenzompires  Jurassic World might be a muggle attraction but Professor Frankenzompire was well and truly old school wizard (very old school) and would be rather annoyed if anyone started waving their wands about in public; to which several young wizards sniggered.

After what seemed like no time at all (I suspect there may have been a bit of magic going on) the convoy of old coaches arrived in the huge coach park of the Jurassic World complex where the young wizards immediately headed off to buy Pterodactyl Burgers and Chipiasaur Fries all covered in Cretaceous Sauce (YUM) . . .

As Harry and his daughter,  Lily Luna wandered round the various sights, Harry insisting that dinosaurs are not good pets and are rubbish at doing tricks, even simple ones like balancing chickens on their heads, they noticed a large flock of flamingos.  As they did so a voice behind them said

O god it Must be that Girl again I recognise all those flamingos, it must be Alice and Higgs and probably that stupid White Rabbit I bet. . . . .  The voice of course was that of Hermione.

But before Harry could respond another voice could be heard that drew Harry’s attention to something else.

Headmaster sir sir sir sir sir its Harrison Ford-Cortina sir sir sir he has sort of had a bit of an accident sir.

As Harry looks off into the distance he can see a huge crowd rushing towards him and behind that is Harrison Ford-Cortina only he is not his normal self, he is looking a little more like a Tyrannosaurus Rex than he did when he got on the coach this morning.

AH DAMN says Harry

WOW DAD can I have Harrison Ford-Cortina As a Pet says Lily Luna HE’S COOL.

Well Master Higgs the White Rabbit did say it would be fun to turn up here and see what was going to happen, I DON'T think anyone or anything has eaten anything or anyone yet said Alice who along with Young Higgs and the White Rabbit were standing on the roof of the monorail stop to avoid the stampeding crowd as it headed towards the main exit.

HELLO HARRY shouted Young Higgs at Harry who was now hiding behind a large fibreglass Ichthyopterygia along with Lily Luna, Hermione and several young wizard pupils as they attempt to avoid screaming muggles as they panic.

Then as it gets quieter and the panicked crowd vanishes off into the distance and Harrison Ford-Cortina growls at Harry Potter in an attempt to explain it was nothing to do with him. The tall and terrifying image of a mad demonic Wizard appears out of a large cloud of wizardly cloudy stuff; it is none other than the awesome and imposing spectacle of Professor Franklin F F Frankenzompire himself, looking a little deranged and annoyed.

To be continued       

(Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them) or Harry Potter Returns from the Dead. . . . PART ONE

After the terrible death of Harry Potter and all the young wizards on Halloween and the subsequent closure of Hogwarts and its brief commercial success as a theme park it vanished from the minds of men and quietly became a ruin.  No one ventured to it as there was talk of terrible beasts and monsters that roamed it's corridors their footsteps echoing through the building.  It was a bad time to be a wizard and those few who survived those terrible events of Halloween were forced into the everyday world of muggles, something they hated, but as the old saying goes . . . . . needs must. . . . . (I know old sayings are silly we just don't know what the needs must do, but it’s a saying).

One such wizard was a Professor Brian Dumblecox who had managed to make a successful career in the sciences of us muggles and became a bit of a celebrity turning everyday objects into stuff that just confused folk using what he called Quantum Mechanics.  We all know he really meant Wizards Magic we are not stupid are we?.

One day Professor Brian Dumblecox’s young son called Higgs was rummaging about in a strange old bookshop only accessible by walking between the walls of M&S and W H Smiths when he came across a book called, Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.  Having bought the book with his pocket money five pence Young Higgs returned home where his father Professor Brian Dumblecox looked and nodded in a knowing way and pointed to the map of the universe on the wall and said

Its time Master Higgs, you have discovered the bookshop.

Yes dad I DON'T know how I got there I was going to W H Smiths.

We live in a multi-dimensional world Master Higgs and you have entered the world of Wizards.

But you said it was Quantum Mechanics dad I watched you on the television.

No son that is just a cunning trick to confuse muggles, we are talking about the world of wizards and you now have to go and fulfil your destiny.

But I’M too young to go on X factor.

NOOOO Not X Factor

And I have only had three dancing lessons, I don’t think I’m good enough for Strictly yet.

O for Gods sake Master Higgs you have to go and restore the Great Harry Potter to Life, Back at Hogwarts where he will become Headmaster and make more films.

WOW like Frankenstein’s Monster with lighting and a bolt through his Neck.

Look son I'm getting angry if you don’t behave I’ll play one of my Albums.

Sorry Dad

Now here is a large Jug with a mummified cat in and a jar of ash from the Wizards Ring of Fire where Harry and the other wizards died you must go now and enter the ruins of Hogwarts where you will discover what you need to do.

With that Young Higgs set off on his intrepid journey with his new book and a ticket for the train, a large jug with a mummified cat and a jar of ash.

He took one last look at the house as he set off down the street his dad shouting after him. . .  AND beware the Wicker Man. . . .  Young Higgs gave him the thumbs up and thought to himself. . . Don’t stare at the vicars van. . . How odd.

TO BE CONTINUED 

PART TWO

Perpetual Motion Machines and Naked Charity Calendars analyzed . . .(PART 2) and introducing Professor Brian Cox

After craftily skimming over all the issues involved in creating the ultimate nude charity calendar of Scientists and Perpetual Motion machines I think it is time to deal with the whole subject in more detail, fundamentally getting to the Bottom (no pun intended) of things.   Interestingly there are two very difficult issues to deal with in creating this particular nude charity calendar that need to be discussed. Firstly the Perpetual Motion Machine is a tricky device to create many have tried and failed, and secondly Scientists generally don’t appear on calendars naked.

Starting with basic principles we all know that a perpetual Motion Machine is a closed loop device and in order to work 100% of the energy in the loop has to stay in the loop. In the old days when man made rather nice Victorian looking machines (The so called Victorian Era) many a chap would construct things that had gears and weights that moved about in a grand fancy looking loop. Simply put they all worked on the same idea. . . .The thing being pushed or pulled was pushed or pulled by the thing pushing or pulling it . . . . (Remember for later)  Simple yes but flawed because of the unseen losses in the loop none of the devices were true closed loop systems. They all were subject to the laws of physics and so gravity results in friction, heat loss, energy lost to the outside environment in small but significant ways, resulting in a less than 100% energy transfer around the loop and failure.

So I can here you type if you are such a smart arse what is the solution to these issues that have left the world of science and even that Professor Brian Cox floundering about scratching their heads and saying . . . . . It’s the engines Captain they’ll nay take it. . . . . Hang on that’s not right.  Well the solution is simple yet extremely difficult and very small. Yes there is only one way to beat the world of the basic laws of Physics and that is to use Quantum Mechanics and make a Sub Atomic Particle Perpetual Motion Machine.  It sounds tricky you would need better eyesight than I have but once you get that small stuff changes and gets weird really weird. Particles can be made to be in two different places at the same time. Remember what I wrote earlier . . . . The thing being pushed or pulled was pushed or pulled by the thing pushing or pulling it . . . . Well with a Sub Atomic Particle Perpetual Motion Machine it changes to . . . . . .  The thing being pushed or pulled is pushed or pulled by two things that were pushed or pulled by it. . . . . . In other words it has a boast of energy in the loop in order to keep it going for eternity or in other words Perpetual Motion or Perpetual Energy. It is why atoms never stop moving and stuff like that.

            

OK tomorrow we can integrate this into the bigger picture for June on the ultimate nude charity calendar of Scientists and Perpetual Motion Machines, and then I will be available for a Nobel Prize round about Christmas. That’s if some Scientist does not nick my idea first, mentioning no names Mr Professor Brian Cox. . . . .  or Mr October as he is know.