After a relatively quiet day at school
doing normal school things, lessons, climb the lamp post next to the playground
and plug in the extension to power the science block., and smuggle in illicit
fish and chips at lunch time from the chip shop and fire a small rocket out of view
of the headmaster as an act of rebellion. It was back home to play with the
chain saw on a pole (an extension, I was not up a pole with a chain saw), a
rather useful gadget to snip parts off some of the trees that are a bit out of
hand in the garden. No not for cutting cats in half as part of a magic act for
the Queens Jubilee party in the village hall…….No no no the idea has not even
entered the mind of myself and the dog, definitely not…. …. ….. …. …. (Much),
mum just said IDIOT.
We now have a Herman cake
with nuts and Chocolate in, although we have not tasted it yet. It came from
Auntie Karen and Ian the Musical Hat Maker and is a friendship cake; it started
thousands of years ago with one cake where the mixture is split and so now
there are millions of them. So it is a pyramid scam really, but instead of
loosing all your money everyone ends up knee deep in cake, so everyone is happy,
thus the friendship cake. I say that but I have yet to taste the cake, luckily
ours does not have healthy stuff like fruit in it PHEW.
I was told that friendship
cakes can sometimes be cursed and make wailing noises and bubble and bite
people with pointy teeth, which sounds WELL COOL, I have suggested to mum that
we should get one of those wild cursed wailing cakes but she said IDIOT again.
That seems a bit unfair they sound jolly exciting.
OK I need to go, I met the
man today who is organizing the Cultural Olympic Exhibition that I am making
the Cardboard Olympia for and I have a month left so no pressure……….YICKS
.
.
Your life is like The Beano comic.
ReplyDeleteWell thank you very much, you have cheered me up loads. I will do my best to continue to meet their exacting standards of life the universe and everything.
DeleteI once managed to read The Beano from cover to cover in one go, although it was some time ago now and the old brain is not as it was.
Mmmm cake!
ReplyDeleteAnd I've ALWAYS loved that version of Gaynor's 'I will survive.' Top choice.
It is rather a good cake toooooo
DeleteThis reminds me of the time we went to the South Pole and when we arrived we found out aLL of our luggage and six months of food and supplies had been switched with a shipment of chainsaws. Fortunately I had only planned on staying for two hours, but everyone else perished.
ReplyDeleteNo doubt the result of a chain reaction. I think it is a bit like the reaction some people have to nuts which can be rather violent.
DeleteI have heard that chain saws can also have very violent reactions with some people, although with others they remain completely harmless (sorry I mean Armless. I think it might also be possible it you have too many chainsaws to end up legless.
Still I'd be perished at the South Pole. It seems odd to think that if you stand right on the South Pole the only place you can look is north. So the old rivalries of the Eastern block and the decadent West cant exist at the North and South Pole. What am I talking about ????? I must go it is late, so goodnight.
ActuaLLy someone told me about that "you can only look north" thingie during my two hours at the south pole, so I went outside and layed down in the snow on the runway and looked straight "up", and the captain of the dirigible that had brought us there and told me the nothing-but-north-notification asked me in broken French, "what are you do ing?" and I told Jacque, "I'm looking south"
ReplyDeleteAs a tribute to that moment of staring out into the south continuum, I left the period off the end of that last sentence.
That is very very clever Mr ESB. What you are really saying is that at the South Pole the only way you can look South is if you lie.
DeleteJust a quick Question for you Mr ESB.
DeleteWhat direction are you looking if you lay down on the equator and look up?
No UP is not allowed
Well, my first guesstimate would be both south and north.
DeleteNorth and south? How?
If you imagine a person standing at the North Pole and you say that he or she or it is looking "South", then transport that person to the equator maintaining the same orientation relative to the sun, let's say looking straight at the sun (with sunglasses on of course). Then when he gets there he will be in the same orient-ation and looking South, only he or she or it will appear to be laying down, with his feet headed towards the south pole. Oh, sorry, I have to run, I just found out my mother is in town! Lunch with mommy! Anyway, if you repeat the same eXperiment starting at the South Pole, maintain same orientation, the person will then be facing North while appearing to be laying flat on the ground. If it was me I would prefer soft sand. Oh, lunch with mommy, I forgot! Gotta go ..... no time to proof read.