Showing posts with label defence ditches. Show all posts
Showing posts with label defence ditches. Show all posts

Monday, 2 June 2014

Demonic Demons seen in Brecon

That Hugh Jackman is rubbish with his rusty nails and grumpy face
Not like Joan Hackman she is great? 

You go all the way to Brecon as part of the Rapid Reaction Zombie Defence Force armed with pointy sticks and a cheery song only to find its not Zombies but Demonic Demons summoned up by rouge (sorry rogue) Druids for reasons that are too difficult to explain as they are all in Welsh.

Anyway the point is the Rapid Reaction Zombie Defence Force doesn’t deal with Demonic Demons that is the specialist area of Demon-Rod with their rather devilish coloured vans and pressure horses (sorry hoses); Demonic Demons hate water.

I would write more, but it is late and it has been yet another long day. Brecon is a fair distance to go for the wrong kind of scary beast. . . Folk really should buy the . . . . .  AaaauuuuggghhhHHH  Zombie Guide Book  . . . . . . Available as soon as I write it both as a hardcover or paperback. CD included giving amazing details of feet claws and forked tongues.  The ideal gift for Christmas or Fathers Day.

OK I better go it's late   

Thursday, 20 June 2013

The Oxbow lake, the Cows and the Zombies.

It was raining first thing this morning but it did not last long, weather machines can sometimes actually work even if 99 percent of the time it is not entirely as expected. It was an interesting day and I have learnt several things, the first of which is that as a chap I can not multi-task as well as I would like, doing Geography while fitting tongue and groove cladding to the walls in what the headmaster calls his brilliantly cunning economy drive by combining practical subjects and academic subjects as well as meeting maintenance targets is harder than it at first may appear. You see the bonding material for the clapping is very sticky and gets everywhere including sealing my books closed for ever, but luckily we were doing the old faithful subject in Geography of Oxbow lakes…….. What is it with Geography and the Oxbow lake apparently they have been the topic of lessons from the days of Stone Age man and the very first schools ever set up in the open next to an Oxbow lakes.

I then discovered when I realized my tin of glue to bond the cladding to the wall had fallen over and leaked onto my craft knives needed to created cardboard things, that the glue dissolves the handles of the craft knives. Not a worry in itself but I have this glue all over my hands and it does not come off that easily, I really do not fancy waking up tomorrow morning to find I can not turn off the alarm clock because my hands have vanished in the night.



I have also discovered that cows and Zombies are in cahoots together and are I suspect even as I type battling their way through the Zombie defence system. The Zombies who are unable to cross the Zombie defence ditch have got the cows eating their way through the large hedge to the side of this defence ditch and we are starting to see the odd head peering through it with all the clinical indifference of a cow who is obviously working with the Zombies to ensure their efforts at world domination will succeed. I don’t know what the cows get out of it but I bet it involves grass, you know what cows are like, after all that saying . . . . ‘the grass is always greener on the other side’ started with cows and Zombies telling them stuff to lead them astray.


On top of all that the pigeons have also started hanging about at night in the trees and I cant help but think there is something going on; at least I can always cover the branches of the tree the pigeons are looking at us from in the glue for the cladding, that will soon stop their little game, maybe I can glue the cows to the ground too or maybe it will dissolve the cows and turn them into a Quatermass experiment. . . . . . WELL COOL . . . . . AH mum has said IDIOT, 


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